


I’d Kick Ass on a Test About You and Me

by dugindeep (hotsauce)



Series: College AU [1]
Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Bottom Jared, F/M, First Dates, Frottage, M/M, Minor Jared/Sandy Friends with Benefits, Top Jensen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-12
Updated: 2019-08-12
Packaged: 2020-08-20 03:02:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 33,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20220715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotsauce/pseuds/dugindeep
Summary: Jared rocks at Calculus, but he fails at paying attention when it comes to Jensen. College AU!





	1. Chapter 1

“Rule numero uno.”

Jared turns slowly and eyes Chad. They’ve had all three months of summer break to determine any possible regulations for living together after spending most of freshman year in Chad’s dormroom (Jared couldn’t stand the smell of his hippie roommate and Chad’s was never around). But this is the first time Chad tries to lay down any laws.

“No anal sex,” Chad says plainly, like it’s a simple request.

“Really?”

“Really.”

“So,” Jared wonders, leaning back on his desk. “That go for you, too?”

“Hell no.”

He crosses his arms and watches Chad start to push t-shirts into his drawers. “Hell no you won’t, or hell no it doesn’t go for you?”

“Don’t go for me.”

“So basically, the gay guy can’t have sex in here?” Jared pushes himself up to sit on the desk and kicks his feet around, waiting for Chad to look at him. But he doesn’t, just nods. Jared adds, “Not even if you’re gone?”

“None at all.”

“How about blow jobs? I can still get blown in my own bed, right?”

Chad turns slowly, squinting, and then staring for a good long time. “Thank you for that. Now I’m picturing you getting your dick sucked.”

Jared smirks. “Awesome, because now I am, too.”

“Fuck,” Chad grunts as he tosses the last of his shirts into a drawer and shoves it closed. “It’s like you’re telepathically shooting gay sex into my head.”

“Yes, I’m most definitely doing that. Now there’s rimming. It feels _awesome_.”

“Whoa,” they hear from the hallway before a bald head pops into view. “What kinda shit you up to in here?”

“Don’t worry,” Chad replies as he stands. “We’ve already declared no gay sex in here.” He nods at their visitor with a smile. “What’s up?”

The guy moves forward to shake Chad’s hand. “Mike Rosenbaum. 1012, right around the corner.”

“Chad,” he nods back then motions to Jared. “And that’s my big gay roommate.”

Mike nods at Jared with a smile. “Big gay roommate have a name?”

Jared smiles and moves forward, shaking Mike’s hand. “Jared. Nice to meet you.”

“Good strong handshake, man,” Mike smiles as he grips right back. 

“I’m gay, not a wimp.”

“Alright,” he laughs. “You guys play ball?”

****

X + X + X + X + X

Throughout the weekend, Chad and Jared spend most daylight hours playing basketball on the courts outside their dorm. Mike, with his roommate Tom, are pretty good matches, and Mike is excessively loud about losing to them. “Screw your mother,” seems to be his typical cry, and Chad just replies, “I will when I’m done with yours.” They’re all laughs and aggressive-but-playful shoving then more laughs and pizza and beer at night. Jared loves his new living arrangements already.

By Monday morning, it’s established that Mike and Jared have Calculus 350 together at 10am, and Mike’s excited that he has someone on his floor to grab notes for him when he ditches. Jared just laughs and assures Mike that he’ll owe him big for it. 

Mike rambles on the way to class about how badly his 200-level Calc class had been last semester because of a teacher with the most unintelligible accent imaginable, but that his friend got him through it. He perks up, slaps at Jared’s chest as they walk in the door. “Bonus! Jenny’s got seats.”

Jared mindlessly follows Mike halfway through the classroom and then he stops and stares and can’t function well enough to sit down. Not even when Mike introduces him to an unbelievably hot guy sitting in an empty row. “Jenny?” Jared asks oddly, not even sure how his mouth managed to get the name out.

As Mike sits down, the guy grumbles, “Way to start up to the new year.”

Mike grabs his notebook and pencil from his backpack and slaps them on his desk. He’s looking forward and not even caring. “Whatever, Jenny.”

“Jensen, dick.” Hearing those two words together does nothing to shock Jared out of openly gaping at him. Jensen reaches across Mike to shake Jared’s hand. “Jensen,” he repeats with an awkward smile that turns a little amused when Jared lamely grabs his hand. “I think you block the view of the people behind us.”

Jared looks back, realizing that everyone is half his size because they’re all seated and he’s not. And he feels like a tool when he's anything but cool as he slides into the seat next to Mike, totally disregarding Jensen’s hand.

Moments later the teacher enters and starts the lecture, and Jared can’t focus on the board because he keeps looking at Jensen out the corner of his eye. Sees how he and Mike are taking notes. And when Jensen leans back in his seat, crosses his ankles, and starts to chew on a pen, Jared’s fucking hooked.

He vows to never miss a class.

****

X + X + X + X + X

When Jared gets back to the room, he’s beaming and jittery. Chad doesn’t look away from his laptop and asks ever so plainly, “What? Did ya fall on a dick in the elevator?”

“Not in the elevator. In Calc.” He dumps his backpack in front of his closet and ambles further into the room. “Shit. Mike’s got, like, the hottest fucking friend.”

“Really? Do tell,” Chad says, voice flat. 

Jared crashes onto his bed, hands landing on his chest and curling into his shirt. “Man, I’m gonna flunk that class. Couldn’t do anything but watch the guy suck a _pen_.”

“Hey, do me a favor?”

“What’s up?” Jared asks as he sits up.

“Go talk to Sandy.”

He runs his hands through his hair and yawns, always hating how hard it is to get back into the new semester after sleeping in late through all of break. “She stop by?”

“No, but I’m not your fag hag.”

Jared chuckles then stands up to look over Chad’s shoulder. “What’re you doing?” A split second later, he winces and whines. “Dude. Porn before noon?”

Chad stretches his arms out and smirks. “It’s noon somewhere.”

He smacks the back of Chad’s head then makes his way out the door to find Sandy.

****

X + X + X + X + X

“If I’d known you knew hot people, I’d hang out with you more.”

Jared reaches across the table to steal a fry. “I got dibs.”

Sandy looks up and gives the sweetest smile possible. One she uses when she asks him for rides to the store or to help her with math and chemistry. “Who says he’s not straight?”

“Who says he doesn’t like dick?”

She smacks his hand as he steals another fry. “I’ve got breasts and hair. No one says no to this package.”

“Some do.”

“You didn’t,” she smiles. 

Jared snorts. “Please. I was drunk. _You_ were drunk.”

She tosses a fry at his nose that he grabs off the table and eats. “Whatever.”

He gives her a warm smile, knowing that it’s not even a big deal to them that they made out at a party last year. And that once in a while it still happens when they’re good and drunk because as she’d easily explained away: he’s usually one of the better looking guys in the room and him being gay in Texas doesn’t allow many opportunities to get any action. But their friendship is easy enough that it never really bothered them. 

“I still say he’s straight.”

Jared finishes the rest of his Cherry Pepsi and barely hides a belch in his fist. “You have no evidence that he is.”

“Ain’t many gays in Texas.”

“What about me?”

She waves a fry in the air before popping it into her mouth. “That’s one.”

“Guys always experiment in college when they’re drunk.”

“Oh, like you,” she smiles.

Jared shrugs easily. “Mouth’s a mouth’s a mouth.”

Sandy wipes her hands on a napkin and eyes him. “We all get drunk and he’ll hit on me first. Guarantee.”

“We’ll see,” he smiles, like it’s a challenge.

****

X + X + X + X + X

A week later in Calc, he does his best to be kinda cool – because he kinda is, Chad even says so, though he’s going to ignore how accented the word _kinda_ usually is. He slides into his seat and gives a little head nod to Jensen and a low, “Hey, what’s up?”

“Hey,” Jensen says easily. Then he punches Mike’s arm. “Saw you playing this weekend.”

Mike grabs Jensen around the neck and squeezes before ruffling his hair. “Baby, I know you missed me.” He kisses the top of Jensen’s head and Jared just stares, feeling his stomach swirl and he’s not sure if it’s in jealously that Mike can get that close to Jensen or just plain want. Because Jensen seems to not be bothered by the touch, and that just might be Clue Number One that Jensen is gay. 

But then he has to wonder if Mike and Jensen are … his eyes clench shut. He’d almost prefer that Jensen were straight so he wouldn’t have to see them act like this. 

Jensen’s voice breaks through, “You’re not too bad ... ” Jared glances over and sees Jensen smiling as he talks over Mike. “For being eleventy feet tall.”

Jared sits forward, clutching the edge of his desk to settle his nerves while praying he doesn’t fuck up his first chance for an actual conversation with Jensen. “Doesn’t hurt to reach right over their heads.”

“Nah, it don’t.” Jensen lays his palm above Mike’s head for Jared to give him five, and when Jared reaches out to do so, Jensen quickly moves his hand and Jared, instead, smacks Mike’s crown.

Mike swings an arm at each of their chests. “Fuck you both with a spoon.”

Jensen laughs and leans back casually in his chair while nodding at Jared. And Jared mentally records that moment, putting it on repeat for the rest of class. He replays how Jensen’s lips curled up, the brightness of his teeth, the flash in his eyes, the creases at the corners. 

When they’re walking from class, Jared hears Mike and Jensen joke about some girl from last semester’s class. It goes on a little longer than he could care about, but he just listens to Jensen’s voice banter with Mike’s. How level and easy it comes out, and how the laughter is pitched a little high while Jensen tips his head back and smiles. _God_, Jared thinks, _to see that smile_. 

It’s been just one week since he first met Jensen and he’s done for.

****

X + X + X + X + X

The thing is … Jared’s really kind of smart. Even if he’d learned the hard way during his first semester that he couldn’t coast by with just paying attention in class like he did for all of high school. He has to put in loads of reading time and spend more than just a few hours on papers, but he still gets near straight As and made the Dean’s list freshman year. Mike insists he has to help with Calc when it gets rough, and he does. But it mostly consists of them sitting around the reading lounge on their floor and bullshitting about other things. Among the range of topics: Tom, who’s a solid guy but kind of keeps to himself when Mike’s not around, and Chad - really just their qualities as roommates, or failures at being good ones; the math nerd of a teacher they listen to every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for an hour; and Jared’s not-so-legendary high school basketball career. Absolutely never broached? Jensen.

Jared spends a majority of class trying to sneak peeks around Mike to see the guy. And while he’s become way too acquainted with Jensen’s mouth – memorizing how the lips suck on the end of a pen or take the brunt of Jensen tapping said-pen against them when he’s lost on the weekly quizzes – he’s not about to drop the name, worried that Mike will read right through him. 

Instead, he spends so many other countless hours just thinking about the guy and all the dirty things he wants to do him – all things Chad has outlawed in their room, but Jared would dare to do anyway.

Jared’s pretty much obsessed with Jensen.

****

X + X + X + X + X

Early one Saturday morning, Mike bangs on the door and instructs them to get their “lily white asses covered and in the hall. Now!”

Jared rolls off the slim bed, knocking Chad on the shoulder on his way, and then drags the door open. “What?”

“Breakfast?”

“Sleep?” Jared asks with a frown.

“Basketball?” Mike offers in a friendlier voice.

Chad marches between them, shoving each out of his way while mumbling, “Gotta piss.”

Mike and Jared share a shrug before Mike goes on. “You gonna play or what? Misha and Jensen are coming.”

“Jensen?” Jared asks, a bit too interested, especially for eight in the morning on a Saturday.

Chad counters with a gravelly, “Misha?” as he pushes his way back into the room.

“Yeah. Guy I know.” Mike shrugs then looks to Jared, punching at his shoulder. “You coming?”

Jared smoothes away the pain at his shoulder but he can’t frown or wince because he’s starting to smile at the thought of seeing Jensen outside of class. His focus goes to not making it all too big, so he just settles himself with an easy, “Yeah.”

They don’t grab a formal breakfast. It’s just dining hall donuts that are obliterated in seconds, even before they exit the dormitory and fight the burning sun. It’s hotter than hell, but it’s also Texas. No real surprise there.

There’s a moment of disappointment when teams are broken off and he’s not with Jensen, but it’s quickly replaced when Mike instructs him to cover Jensen. He does pretty well for himself, running into Jensen’s space, waving arms to block passes. And he and Mike are battling fairly well along with Tom to stay within just a few baskets of Jensen, Chad, and Misha. They’re all getting animated and playing harder than before, like the sun is egging them on to do it right. There are a few errant elbows, some stepped-on toes, understandably all okay. Jared’s team finally catches up and ties at 20, intent to finish the game at 21. 

He’s tossed up balls as much as he can in a last ditch effort and Mike’s crabbing at him and Jensen’s talking so much trash it makes Jared laugh. But what really gets Jared into trouble is when the sun is soaking all their clothes and Jensen unabashedly peels his shirt off and tosses it to the corner of the court before pounding the ball back into the asphalt. Jared can’t not stare.

“You ready, JP?” he smirks as he tauntingly moves closer then shifts to the side, avoiding Jared’s defense. 

Jared doesn’t even know where the nickname came from, but he’s going to take it, along with that dangerous smile Jensen keeps giving while roughhousing his way into Jared’s space. He gives a sideways grin, “Bring it, Jenny.”

Jensen’s scooting back, edging Jared further into court and closer to the basket while he keeps dribbling and eyes Chad and Misha floating around, practically absorbed by Mike and Tom’s coverage. Jared pulls up right behind him, swiping hands around him, trying to get a finger on the ball and disrupt the play, but it doesn’t work. There are a few swift elbows as Jensen grumbles something about being called Jenny, and Jared tosses out a few more childish remarks. Jensen just pushes back on him and Jared is trying _so_ hard to function and focus on the ball. Absolutely not thinking about how Jensen’s broad back is slotting right up to his chest. Or how hot the skin is against the thin, worn, sleeveless tee Jared’s wearing. Or how Jensen’s still got that sly little grin on his face and he keeps meeting Jared’s eyes as he shifts left then right then left again.

“Thought you could handle playing with the big boys,” Jensen taunts.

He wants to wipe all the sweat out of his face, push hair away, but the minute he moves from Jensen he loses the play as well as all that contact and heat and pressure on his body. He’s dying for it to be more. He leans right in, feeling the slide of their bodies as they keep shuffling along the court. “Think I’m doing well enough,” Jared nearly pants out. Then he reaches forward and gets a digit on the ball. Jensen reaches forward for it, grabbing with both hands and solidifying his current spot on the court without travelling. “C’mon Jenny,” he chuckles. “What’s the gameplan now?”

Jared pushes in closer, swinging hands again and trying to get Jensen off balance, but Jensen pushes right back, forcing Jared to practically cover his whole back. He could step away, but it might mean giving up a pass, and they’re playing to the death now, or so it seems. He’s not going to let up on Jensen, not when there’s trash being tossed around.

“Still got a few tricks up my sleeve.”

“Yeah, right,” Jared laughs.

“Just you wait …”

They’re still pushing and edging each other out while Jared only focuses on Jensen and the ball and his body … and shit, really, it’s all just an extension of Jensen. “Waiting and looking. Ain’t seein’ anything,” Jared taunts again. 

And that’s when Jensen pushes rougher with his lower body and Jared feels the distinct press of Jensen’s ass into his groin, across his dick. It’s hot and firm and then Jared’s feeling himself go stiff. He has to back up in an instant to not get any further than thinking _wantwantwant_, scared to death it’ll become _needneedneed_ and he’ll do something stupid.

Instead, Jensen pivots, takes advantage of the lack of defense, and tosses up a shot. The smirk on Jensen’s face tells Jared that it’s sunk and the game’s over. He moves closer, one hand on Jared’s shoulder and the other smacks, pretty damned hard, at the chest. “Maybe next time, kiddo.”

“Yeah,” Jared grumbles while unconsciously performing a hard-on check.

Jensen’s eyes dart down then quickly back to Jared before he’s moving over to Tom. As soon as Jensen’s gone, Jared frowns and a wide palm covers the place that he’d been hit. He keeps his hand there, not sure if it’s really still the stinging of raw skin or the warmth from Jensen’s hand, while he moves to the edge of the adjacent lawn to grab his water bottle. 

Chad pops into view, jabbing fists into the air and sparring with nothing but Jared’s personal space. “Ol’ boy got you good!” he crows.

Jared drops into a seated position on grass just so he doesn’t have to see Chad’s smug face anymore. He’s not pissed at the loss so much as extremely uncomfortable about those last moments with Jensen and how quickly he – or his dick really – had responded. He worries that Jensen felt it and that would explain why the guy isn’t looking anywhere near him or Chad, even when everyone else is. He draws his knees up and rests his forearms on them while tossing Chad evil glares because the guy is then popping back and forth, trying to play but obviously not catching on that Jared’s not up for it. Chad swings a foot, absolutely playing on all the times they wrestle and recreate shitty karate movies, but the foot gets close and he nearly hits Jared in the temple.

He falls back on reflexes and then stays on his back, staring up at the sky. Because then he doesn’t have to see Chad’s head or the back of Jensen’s.

Misha’s face, open and goofy, appears above him. “You okay, Jared?” he asks easily.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he mumbles.

His head tips to the side with wonder. “What’s wrong? You look worried.”

Jared moves to cover his face with his hands. He blocks out the sun and Chad and Misha and fucking Jensen. “Nothing.”

Misha crouches down to sit at Jared’s knees, which forces Jared to give the most confused glance he’s sure he’s ever given anyone, but then he covers his face again. Misha’s voice is still soothing, fairly innocent. “Something’s bothering you. Your chest still hurt?”

“No, my dick,” Jared grinds out between his teeth before he even thinks of it.

“We need a medic,” Misha calls out with a light voice while standing up.

When Jared removes his hands and scrunches his face up to Misha, he’s actually met with a tentative Jensen. “Get up, you big baby,” Jensen mutters while grabbing onto Jared’s arm and hauling him off the ground. 

“_You’re_ a big baby,” he replies, lamely. But he doesn’t get any response from Jensen except an odd glance because Chad’s suddenly jumping on his back, winding arms under his neck and drawing everyone’s attention.

“My big gay homo is alive!” he screeches in Jared’s ear. 

Except Jared kind of wishes he was six feet under.

****

X + X + X + X + X

It’s pretty quiet in class that week. Jared does his best to stare at the front of the class rather than to his right. He’s not exactly paying attention to the teacher or what goes up on the board, but at least he’s not looking for Jensen or for any assurances that things aren’t weird after the game. He doesn’t want to see an odd look, telling him that Jensen’s uncomfortable with his presence.

Mike eyes him oddly all week, like he’s waiting for him to give it up and admit to going hard while playing basketball with Jensen, and how every night and most mornings since he thinks about that play again and imagines that they’re both shirtless, sweat draining from their necks down their chests and Jared’s arms wind around Jensen to hold the ripples of muscle against his chest instead of just to bat a ball away and then Jensen pushes back on him …

And basically, Jared keeps reliving the entire moment in his head whenever he’s not focused on something else. He’s torturing himself for the three hours he sits just five feet from Jensen. 

That next Sunday night, Mike taps on the door and wedges it open enough to pop his shiny, bald head in. “We’re hitting Wal-Mart.”

“That’s nice,” Jared mumbles from his bed, not looking up from his Microbiology book. 

“I gotta take gimpy,” Mike complains, kicking the door open further and showing off Tom with a crisp white cast on his left ankle and a pair of crutches under his arms. “Don’t make me do this alone.”

Chad cackles as he asks, “What happened? Mike try to pop you in the shower again?”

“Fuck you,” Tom says, succinctly. 

“You coming?”

Chad jumps up but Jared hesitates. He’s gotten so little out of any class this week that he’s pretty sure he should stay in and finish all the homework on his to-do list. Not to mention he’s been good at pouting over that one awful play of last week’s basketball game. He decides to go back to his reading. 

“Jare, c’mon, man.” 

He just motions to his book. “Thanks anyway.”

“Come out for an hour. The molecular habitat of monkey lice and Chad’s ball algae will be here when you get back.”

He relents and is actually feeling okay about it, until they get to the front lot of the dorm and he realizes that Misha’s driving them all in his van and he’s forced to slide into the back seat next to Jensen with Chad crowding him on the other side.

Jared gives a low, “Hey,” that Jensen returns much the same. And neither talk for the short minute drive off campus to the superstore, only listening to Tom talk about how he’d tripped over a pile of Mike’s clothes in front of _his_ closet and that he had always been right that Mike’s filth would someday kill him. 

At the store, Jared ambles along, a few steps behind the crowd. They cruise the main aisles without a care for how loud they’re talking or what they actually came here for. But Jared gets the idea that it’s not really for shopping when Misha jumps into the empty cart Mike’s pushing. Mike laughs and starts moving them faster, and as they pass Tom, Misha reaches out and snags one of Tom’s crutches.

“Oh, come on!” Tom shouts.

Misha points the crutch in front of him as Mike runs down the main stretch of tile. “On to the castle, my fine man!” Misha calls with a surprising air of dignity to his voice. “M’lady awaits her rescue!”

Jared’s laughing for the first time since that basketball game, and he finds Jensen laughing right alongside him. “What the fuck?” he asks on shrug.

Jensen scrubs a hand over his face, trying to calm his laughter. “I don’t know, man. Not my friends.”

“They are _so_ your friends. I wouldn’t even know you if it weren’t for them.”

He pauses for a second and eyes Jared before nodding then motioning towards Tom, who’s barely making it with one crutch after Chad left him to catch up to Misha’s chariot. “Think we oughta help?”

Jared looks between Jensen and Tom then shrugs. “We have to?”

“Yeah, you dick,” Jensen laughs, punching at his shoulder as they head off to the front of the store and retrieve a motorized cart. Jensen steers it back to the middle of the place, flippant with the controls and randomly swiping to the left and right, chuckling and making Jared pretty damned amused. After a wide turn, he drops casually, “So, what’s been with you this week?”

There’s a quick glance to Jensen then Jared tries to sound innocent with his, “What?” 

“Been quiet in class. Everything okay?”

The cart comes to a stop and Jared frowns a little at Tom, realizing the conversation also has to stop here. “Oh, thank the nuts,” Tom sighs. “I’m gonna split Misha right down the back.”

“Kinky,” Jensen smiles as he moves out of the way for Tom to get into the cart and get going. “Think he’ll catch up to them?”

Jared looks around the store, and for as big as it is, it’s pretty empty at this hour. “I’m sure we’ll hear it.”

Jensen starts walking and Jared can’t help but follow. But he’s quiet, especially when Jensen asks, “You sure everything’s okay?”

“Just stuff from home,” he instantly lies. 

“Yeah? Like what?”

Jared shrugs, works his mouth a few times before he finally gives a lame, “No need to bother you with it. Don’t worry.”

They’re suddenly in front of the furniture department and Jensen grabs a beanbag chair, dropping it at the edge of an aisle and settling down. “Should probably snag a seat. They’re gonna be at this for a while.”

It’s then that Jared hears the proclamation, “To Nottingham!” and when he turns, Misha is headed their way, crutch still mighty in the air and Mike still pushing him along. 

It’s a few seconds before there’s the puttering of the motorized cart and Tom’s crabby voice. “You’re gonna be crawling for days when I’m done with you!”

Jared pulls a beanbag over and plops down with an easy sigh. “How long ‘til they make the next pass?”

His lips curl into a smile before he answers, “I give it a good three minutes. Mike’s not much for longevity.”

“Something you know personally?” Jared asks, trying to joke but he can tell it comes out awkwardly.

Jensen looks over and stares for a few moments. “No, not exactly.”

He leans his head back, staring at the ceiling and welcoming the burn of the bright lights above them. He feels like an ass for having asked. 

There are faint rumbles of Misha’s voice calling out other ridiculous things with Tom’s angry response from a few aisles over and Jensen chuckles. “These guys.”

Jared looks over with a small smile, hearing Jensen’s laugh and seeing how his face lights up so easily. “How _do_ you know them?”

He chuckles before settling himself a little lower into the beanbag, stretching his legs out. “Mike and I are both in the Calc program. Freshman year, he attached himself to me when he saw I had a 97 on the first test. He just never seems to go away.”

“Kinda like herpes,” Jared tries to joke, but then he nearly chokes on his own spit when Jensen looks at him oddly. His face screws up for a second. “Not like I know.” When Jensen continues staring, he finally shrugs, “Chad.”

Jensen laughs, truly laughs and it makes Jared smile more. “How in the hell did you ever get Chad as a roommate, anyway? You lose some major bet or is it community service?”

“No, no,” he chuckles. “We were neighbors last year. We were always together because we hated our roommates.”

“So you’re willingly living with him?”

“Yeah,” Jared says, trying to push more confidence in that one word. 

“Huh.”

He swallows and looks over at Jensen, trying to not sound as awkward as he feels. “He’s really not that bad.”

Then they hear the raggedy engine of the motorized cart with Tom complaining, “Get off! You’re slowing me down!”

They see Chad perched on the back as it moves no faster than three miles per hour, Jared’s sure. Chad shoots back, “Dude, go scrub your vagina and then tack your balls back into place.” He smacks Tom’s back and tries to encourage, “Let’s go! Pedal to the metal, grandma.”

Jared frowns then tries to hide his embarrassment. “He’s really not so bad.”

“Guess you’re like Mother Theresa?”

He smirks at Jensen’s tease and nods. “I’d like to think so.”

Jensen laughs. “It certainly does put things into perspective.”

“Mishka! We should check out the unmentionables section. Maybe some leopard or zebra pieces?” they hear Mike call out before the cart hauling Misha zooms right past them, now going in the opposite direction.

Jared laughs and looks over to Jensen. “What about you? They’re not exactly sane.”

His mouth quirks. “No, they really aren’t.”

“Don’t think you can judge me on Chad anymore.”

“Dude,” Jensen laughs. “I’m going to judge you forever.”

“What? Why?” Jared asks, as if he were truly insulted by it, though his smile betrays that.

He can’t seem to get through the explanation with a straight face or without laughing. “You _live_ with him.”

Jared points out with a smile, “Yeah, but you still seem to be around Mike and Misha all the time.”

With an odd shake of his head, Jensen tries to explain. “It’s more of a group thing? A collective unit, you know?” he finishes with a shrug. 

He watches Jensen for a few moments then looks away with a tiny smile. 

****

X + X + X + X + X

It’s been five weeks now that Jared’s been crushing on Jensen. Things are relatively okay now that they’ve, like, talked. Especially after the basketball game when Jensen didn’t seem to have an inkling to Jared’s bodily reaction to him. So he can manage a few words throughout class and his little wandering fantasies are a bit easier to handle. Or, at least, he’s not so embarrassed by them anymore. Because at this point, he’s no longer only dreaming of all the things Jensen’s mouth could do to him. He’s now imagining how he could make him smile and laugh and eyes shine like they do when Mike cracks a particularly funny joke. Jared’s dying to get closer to the guy but feels like he’s dead in the water because Mike’s always sitting between them or walking along with them from class and Jared can’t even attempt to make a move.

He’s feeling desperate and is dying to figure something out. Mike and Jensen are rambling on about the newest slasher flick when Jared blurts out. “Hey, there’s a party Saturday?”

They turn to him and neither says anything for a few seconds until Jensen smirks. “You askin’ or you tellin’?”

Jared winces for his stupidity, but his stomach is warming to the drawl and he wants to kiss the guy right there. “No, there is. We’re having a party.”

Mike punches at Jared’s shoulder. “Thought you were going to your brother’s? Had to dogsit while he’s gone?” 

“Uh, yeah. It’s at his house. Because they’re gone,” he repeats lamely. “You guys gonna come?”

Jensen looks between Mike and Jared. “Where he live?”

“Jared’s farm country,” Mike smarts with an exaggerated accent. “It’s only four towns over.” Jensen shrugs a little with a questioning face.

“Yeah, it’s not far. And they have a yard and a pool and a table. A pool table, you know,” he rambles on, not even knowing how to control himself now that he has Jensen’s attention, and maybe interest. “’But yeah. I’m getting a keg, and inviting old high school friends. And you guys.” Jared smiles, trying to make it all sound right and like it was his plan all along. “It’ll be good. House is big.”

Jensen shrugs again and nods. “Yeah, that’s cool. You gonna go?” he asks Mike.

Mike pushes at Jared’s head. “I’ll think about it.”

But he doesn’t even care, because Jensen said _Yeah, that’s cool_ and it really is.

****

X + X + X + X + X

Of course, now that he has Jensen agreeing to actually show up to a social gathering that will include alcohol and Jared’s chance to strip the guy down of any inhibitions and find out if he’s possibly, maybe gay, no one else is going to join them. He ignores the fact that he’s giving everyone just twenty-four hour notice and still lays on the guilt trips. None of them work.

Chad bows out because he’s finally got a date with the freshman from his Accounting class. “Dude, I’ve been milking her for _weeks_. There’s no way I’m driving to your brother’s house when I’ll have the room to myself.”

He comes to realize that most of his high school friends are either at _other_, farther schools, or they kind of dropped off the face of the earth when Jared stopped making a concerted effort to keep in touch freshman year. 

Sandy has a major group project due Tuesday and has to spend hours upon hours with four classmates to tie it all up. 

And Mike had insisted he, Tom, and Misha would caravan with a bunch of others, but sometime around six on Saturday, Jared gets a text that Misha’s van had an unfortunate incident with a parking block at Wal Mart and was rendered pretty useless until he could see a mechanic on Monday.

So he sits around the house, grumbling and pouting and crossing his arms tight across his chest while he watches mind-numbing buddy comedies on the big screen TV. Once in a while, he curses Sadie and Harley for even existing, or his brother and sister-in-law for their weekend getaway, because if not for either he could’ve just stayed at school and found something better to do than sulk in the family room.

Jared’s nodding in and out of sleep after a while, literally boring himself to sleep when the doorbell rouses him. He practically stomps his way to the front door and when it opens to Jensen, he just stares and doesn’t move except to widen his eyes. 

Jensen tips his head to look around Jared then nearly frowns. “Quiet party.”

“Fuck,” Jared mumbles. 

“There a password or something?”

He says lamely, “I’m guessing you didn’t hear? Didn’t talk to Mike?”

“Nah, I came straight from my place,” Jensen shrugs then he gets an odd worried look. “Why? Something happen?”

“Uh,” he starts, not wanting to spit out that everyone bailed on him. This is the first time he’s ever been with Jensen without Mike or a couple dozen other people close by, and he’s pretty sure he doesn’t want to be bitter through the whole experience. “Misha wrecked his car. They’re not coming.”

Jensen stuffs his hands into his pockets and eyes Jared oddly. “So, I’m not allowed in because they’re not here?”

“Oh, well, no, of course not.” Jared moves to the side and lets Jensen in before him. He takes advantage of the moment and checks out Jensen’s ass, which looks amazing in his tattered jeans. 

Jensen looks around the house as he creeps down the hallway towards the family room. He chuckles a little, “Everyone else get into a car accident?”

Jared nervously plays with the edge of his tee. “Nah. I guess … guess house parties aren’t cool anymore?” he shrugs and then quickly moves past Jensen to the kitchen. “You want a beer?”

“Drove all this way. Might as well.”

It is so terribly awkward, Jared can’t stand it. And he can’t stand how stupid he is in not doing much more than just offering lame options like “TV in the family room?” or “leftover pizza?”

Jensen takes both and they watch the last half of The Godfather and most of its sequel, both cut so badly for regular TV, and have crappy day-old pizza with a few more beers. They both sprawl out on the couch, feet up on the coffee table. Jared’s too shell shocked by the fact that Jensen’s just a few feet away without anyone else in a couple-hundred-foot radius that he can’t even manage any conversation other than answering random questions from Jensen. Like where the brother went off to, a little about the dogs as he scruffs up their necks, if Jared’s seen the new DeNiro movie. It’s all so awkward and Jared’s dying over the fact that he’s just completely shut down and is unable to do or say a damned thing until Jensen yawns and stretches, pushing himself further into the cushions.

Jared finally looks over, for longer than a quick little glance. He watches how Jensen’s shirt now rests flat across his stomach instead of crunching up like before. He can see the solid planes of Jensen’s abdomen, the crest of muscles at his chest. And he can’t stop staring now, just keeps looking from the corner of his eye until Jensen’s hand pushes into the cushion and he sits up a little. Jared shoots a quick look up to Jensen and he knows he’s caught.

So, as lamely as he’s done everything else so far, he asks, “You have a girlfriend?” When Jensen just stares back, Jared clears his throat. “I have this friend. Sandy. Think you guys might be good together.”

Jensen’s eyebrows rise and then so do Jared’s – he’s not even sure where the hell that came from. “Really?”

“Maybe? I don’t know. She’s real pretty,” he says quickly. “Chad went after her for most of freshman year, but she shot him down. She has standards.”

“Good to know,” Jensen chuckles and goes right back to the TV. 

It’s quiet, uncomfortably so, and Jared wants a knife to stab his ears so he doesn’t have to know how weird it all is. He shoots looks Jensen’s way every so often, and he barely manages to pay attention to the TV, and it all really, really sucks. Because he has Jensen _right here_ but he can’t drum up enough courage to do or say anything, even to think of a better activity than just watching a choppy, edited version of _The Godfather_.

“Hey, you said there’s a pool?”

He looks at Jensen and everything sounds perfect right there. Swimming, wet and warm and Jensen half naked. Jared feels like his mouth is fumbling to respond, but he finally manages, “Yeah, out back.”

An eyebrow goes up. “So, not in the basement?” Jared just stares while Jensen goes on with the teasing. “Funny, my parents have one in their bedroom. I’d never pegged you to be a backyard-pool kind of family.”

Jared finally swallows then shoves at Jensen’s shoulder with a laugh. “Shut up, ass. Now you don’t get to swim.”

“Wanna sit outside at least? It’s kind of a waste to stay in here all night.”

He swallows again, because while it’s not Jensen coming out and saying that this is an all-nighter sort of deal, he is talking about hanging around longer than just a few beers, and he’s reminded … he has Jensen all to himself. Jared scrambles to his feet. “Yeah, that’s fine. I’ll grab more beer?”

Jensen nods with a smile, “Good deal.”

“Um, it’s out there,” he says lamely while pointing just as lamely toward the patio doors off the family room.

His mouth quirks. “Wouldn’t have thought it’d be outside.”

“Shut up, dick.”

Jensen laughs and teases Jared for calling him ass and dick in a one-minute time span. But then Jared’s stomach swirls and warms at those two words together when being around Jensen. He focuses on grabbing as many cans of beer that his hands can manage, and while it’s the shitty stuff Jeff drinks, he’s thankful there’s enough there to keep them lubricated … loose. Jared curses himself out for getting this anxious about the whole thing.

Except when he gets into the yard, Jensen’s already pulling his shirt over his head and even in the dark of the under-lit yard, he can see the toned muscles across his broad back and at his stomach as he turns towards Jared and smiles. “Think that’s enough?”

Jared tries not to gulp and just focuses on setting the cans on a small glass table, but he fumbles them when he hears Jensen’s zipper lower. 

“You okay?”

He looks up with a fast nod. “Yeah, I’m cool. Just … a little dark, ya know?” Jared busies himself with the light switches at the back porch and settles on the ones that illuminate the pool water. Jensen’s drinking another beer and Jared’s mouth is dry as he watches Jensen tip his head back and how the throat works with swallowing quickly. Jared grabs a beer, nearly breaking the tab off as he opens it then he swallows nearly half of it before he pauses and meekly smiles at Jensen’s cool grin. 

“You good?”

Jared wipes the edge of his mouth with the back of his hand. He sees that Jensen’s pants are undone, but still resting on his hips, giving a peak of dark boxer briefs. His eyes finally meet Jensen’s and he faintly smiles. “Yeah, yeah.”

Jensen sips his way through the rest of his beer and sets the empty next to the couple others Jared had brought. He seems to eye them for a few moments before he tauntingly and aggravatingly lowers his jeans and carefully steps out of them. Jared watches every movement, the roll of Jensen’s shoulders, of his stomach muscles tucking in and out as he reaches down to grab the jeans off the ground and then puts them over the back of a nearby chair. When he looks at Jared there’s a little mischievous quirk to his mouth and he takes two quick steps and launches himself into the pool, cannonballing and creating enough splash to get Jared a bit wet. 

But he doesn’t care, he just smiles and watches Jensen break through the water and shake his head and run a hand over his wet spiky hair. He wades around, long arms and legs stroking through the water. “You comin’ in?”

He gulps and then anxiously nods as he trips over the leg of a chair in an effort to get closer to the pool. He hears Jensen laugh, but he doesn’t want to look, just sucks down the rest of his beer. His fingers fumble with the button and fly of his pants, and he has to pause to take a long breath. 

“Hey, hand me another beer?”

Jared mumbles, “Yeah, of course,” as he grabs a can and moves to the edge of the pool, and lowers it. 

Jensen grabs onto the can but his other hand comes up, circling Jared’s wrist and quickly tugging him into the water, clothes and all. Jared’s sputtering up to the surface, clothes soaked and heavy but Jensen’s laughing with crazy bright eyes and a wide grin that Jared can hardly care. 

“Funny, jerk,” he says with no heat and a broad smile. 

“I thought it was.”

He tries to frown, but it doesn’t work because Jensen looks amazing in the pool, wet and shiny with the underwater lights highlighting the perfect shape of his body. Jared gulps again. Then he’s moving slowly to remove his soaked shirt and peel away his now-heavy jeans. With a tiny smile, he moves closer to the patio and then tosses the clothes right on top of Jensen’s dry ones.

“Hey!” Jensen calls out with utterly no heat and all laughter.

“What?” Jared laughs back. 

“Fucker. Soaking my clothes.”

He just flicks an eyebrow and shoots Jensen a broad grin. 

They settle at edges of the pool near the same corner so they’re close but not too close and Jared can keep watching Jensen from the corner of his eye without looking too crazy. He can see Jensen’s abs working as he holds the edge of the pool but strings his legs out in front of him, floating then paddling gently. It’s a nice view. “Too bad no one else came out,” Jensen says so quietly that Jared has to stare for a few moments to realize what it was that he said. “This pool’s pretty sweet,” he smiles.

Jared tips his head back to feel the cool water rush over his scalp and calm him a little. “Yeah. I should probably come out here more often.”

“Surprised you don’t have more parties here.”

He frowns. “Not like my brother’s gone every weekend. Plus you see how this one turned out.”

Jensen laughs then ducks his head far enough below water that he’s blowing bubbles through his nose. He moves up and talks at the surface of the water. “Guess you find out how much people really like you,” he chuckles. 

Jared stares at Jensen for a few moments then looks away while biting down on his smile, because he’s pretty sure Jensen likes him enough to stick around like this. And maybe there really is something here. 

They drink three more beers a piece then decide to go back in before they’re all pruned skin and unable to even walk up the stairs of the pool. They eat more leftover pizza and settle in the couch with beach towels while Jared runs their clothes through the dryer. Fluffy towels cover most of Jensen’s skin, but Jared doesn’t mind it so much. Just knowing that they’re both in their boxers and just feet apart on the couch is enough for him. 

There’s small talk about whatever movie they find but can barely pay enough attention to because it’s nearly four in the morning and they’ve had lots of beer and pizza to hold them down. But Jared’s still smiling about it.

****

X + X + X + X + X

When Jared wakes up, he’s huddled into a corner of the couch with aches in his back and neck. The TV’s still on, wheeling through some lame morning political show and the room is mostly dark. And empty, because Jensen’s gone, and Jared’s stomach drops. This is the first time he’s been alone with Jensen, had a space all to themselves and he hadn’t accomplished anything substantial. Yeah, he’d had Jensen down to his boxers and laughing and talking, but he’d also … _shit_, he berates himself. He had offered to set Jensen up with Sandy. Not exactly part of his grand scheme to make out with Jensen.

He’s practically smacking himself as he moves into the kitchen and decides he should just drown himself in beer. But then he smiles because on the kitchen counter is a note. _Thanks for the warm beer and cold pizza. You’re a class act._ Followed by a goofy smiley face to punctuate the sarcasm.


	2. Chapter 2

“So you’re saying there’s a chance!” Jared crows the second he’s back in the dorm.

Chad doesn’t look away from his laptop, typing away for a paper. “For you to stop being so gay?”

Jared laughs, “Fuck you.” 

“Fucking me ain’t gonna help that campaign.”

He tosses his overnight bag on his bed and sits beside it, propping his feet up on Chad’s bed. “Jensen. He doesn’t hate me.”

“Was he supposed to?”

There’s a pause for thought and Jared realizes that there was no reason to. Well, except for the whole basketball debacle and maybe to think Jared was utterly lame to offer a house party and have nothing but shitty Labatt’s beer that his brother left in the fridge and day-old pizza. “He left a note.”

Chad nearly sounds interested when he asks, “Was there an envelope full of money?”

“No, fucker. I’m not a whore.”

“Who’re you not a whore for?” Mike asks, appearing the doorway. 

“No one,” Jared replies instantly but winces when Chad pipes up, “Jensen.”

Mike eyes Jared and then squints a little. “Jensen?”

He shrugs and tries to unpack his stuff so he doesn’t have to look at Mike’s curious stare. “Nah, I mean, I guess he didn’t know you weren’t coming Saturday.”

“He showed up anyway?”

Jared still won’t turn around. He doesn’t want to know what kind of face Mike’s making now because his voice is pitched oddly and making Jared uncomfortable. “Uh, yeah, we just watched some movies and ate shitty pizza.”

Chad leans back in his chair and watches the whole thing with a smirk, which Jared nearly growls at. “Did you show him your collection of gay porn?”

“Fuck off,” Jared complains, smacking the back of Chad’s head.

“Blair Dicks Project? Schindler’s Fist? Black Cock Down?” Chad stretches his arms out and gives a little flick of his eyebrows with his smirk. Jared smacks at Chad’s forehead, and the way Chad flinches causes him to shake in the chair and fall to the ground with a yelp. 

“Perfect,” Jared laughs. “I feel way better now.”

Mike laughs and waits for Chad to settle back in a chair before he offers, “Saturday, douchebags. We’re gonna play ball, you in?”

Jared shrugs and makes a _meh_ sound, remembering how that last game went. No matter how okay things are with Jensen now, he doesn’t need it to go bad again. He’s working his way up. Chad picks up on it and does the same, trying to hide his smile.

“It’s reverse skins, we need lots of bodies.”

Chad snorts, “Sounds like Jared’s kinda party.”

Mike leans against Chad’s dresser and smirks. “Nah, it’s like horse. But you put on more clothes when you lose.”

“Putting clothes _on_? That really doesn’t sound like fun to me,” Jared replies as he lounges out on his bed, hands behind his head.

“Jared’s gay, in case you couldn’t tell,” Chad says.

Jared’s leg reaches far enough to kick Chad’s chair. “Screw you.”

“Not with all the tequila in the world.”

Mike’s voice gets loud over their bickering, “Alright, you guys in or not?”

“Who’s playin’?” Chad asks.

As Mike ticks off a random spattering of names Jared’s never heard before, he suddenly focuses on _Jensen_ and he just stares at Chad, hoping the guy will save him here.

Chad eyes him back then slowly says. “I dunno. We’ll have to see if Jared’s menstruating.”

Jared kicks him again, but Chad slides far enough to avoid a hit. Mike laughs and calls out as he leaves, “Alright, ladies, I’ll leave you to the tampon brigade. “

As Chad settles, Jared kicks at him again. “You’re a dick.”

“Dude. It’s just ball. Gimme a break,” he huffs as he starts typing again. “So you’ve got a hard-on for Ackles. Do something about it.”

“Yeah, I tried. Invited you all out to Jeff’s, but you assholes ditched us.”

“And you still didn’t capitalize.”

“Fuck off.”

Chad turns in his chair to watch Jared sulk. “Look, the guy don’t hate you, even after you rubbed your dick up his ass.” Jared shoots him what Chad calls his bitchface. Chad smiles again. “Just play it cool, rub on him again, and see if he just sits right on your lap. Voila!”

Jared tries to fight the laugh and instead just huffs. “Whatever.”

****

X + X + X + X + X

Thursday afternoon, Jared meets Sandy in the quad and they lay out in the grass, basking in the crisp Texas sun. She rests her head at his stomach and puts her sunglasses on. “You had him in his boxers and you didn’t do anything?”

“I got him drunk?” Jared tries, but even he knows it doesn’t work.

“And you didn’t do anything,” she points out again.

“No.”

“I’m sorry, honey, but I don’t think he’s gay.”

“What?” he quickly argues as he sits up a little. “How does just one night determine this? You don’t even know him.” She turns her head to look up at him and nearly frowns. “I mentioned you … like setting you two up and he barely blinked.”

She rolls her eyes. “You had him drunk in the pool and nothing happened.”

“Maybe he’s slow. Like me.”

Sandy turns back up to the sky and nods. “You _are_ slug slow.”

“Screw you.”

“If you don’t get him soon, I just may have to. I can smell the pheromones.”

Jared laughs, but then startles when he feels shade blocking the sun. He peeks up and sees Jensen smiling down on him. “Oh, hey!” he says way too loudly and sits up so fast he dislodges Sandy. “Hey, what’s up?”

Jensen smirks and looks between him and Sandy. “Nothing. Just saw you across the way. Thought I’d ask about that quiz from yesterday?”

“Oh, yeah. I think I did okay. I’m pretty sure I got the extra credit.”

He nods and bites on his bottom lip. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure I didn’t. Think I miscalculated the derivative.”

Jared laughs, but not so much at him, just more out of nerves because he’s not sure what to really say here.

Sandy moves to lean over Jared. “Hi, I’m Sandy,” she smiles sweetly.

“Jensen,” he nods while shaking her hand. Then he looks at Jared with an odd glance. “_The_ Sandy?”

He grumbles a little, but Sandy saves it when she says, “Jared’s told me so much about you.”

Jared rolls his eyes and tries to kick her without drawing too much attention. 

Jensen nods. “Alright.” There’s a moment of quiet before he adds, “I’m sorry, I guess Jared doesn’t like talking about girls or something?”

She laughs and shoots Jared an amused look. “Yeah, he doesn’t seem to ever talk about girls.” There’s another weird pause in the conversation, but Sandy, ever so sweet, works her best to cover it. “It’s a shame we haven’t met before. Been a few months now that you guys have had class.”

“Yeah,” Jensen nods. Then he repositions his backpack and quirks his mouth. “Alright. Well, just wanted to ask. About the quiz, ya know?”

“Yeah, no, that’s cool,” Jared says quickly. 

Jensen waves a hand from where it holds a strap at his shoulder. “Nice to meet you.” 

“Yeah, you, too, Jensen,” she beams back.

He takes a few steps away but then turns. “Hey, I had invited the guys over this weekend. My roommates decided this morning to have a thing. Why don’t you two come by, too?”

When Jared fails to answer, Sandy smacks at his stomach. “We’d love to! Right?”

Jared nods, “Yeah, of course.”

Jensen shoots them a smile then goes back on his way. Sandy smacks Jared’s stomach even harder. “Jesus Christ. Where’ve you been keeping him locked up?”

He nearly whimpers as he drops back to the ground. “Fuck.”

“What?” she asks as she leans over him. 

“I don’t know, just fuck,” Jared whines. “I can’t even … I didn’t say anything. I bragged about getting the extra credit. Shit.”

Sandy smirks down on him, pushing some hair off his forehead. “Oh, sweetie. You can’t help it you’ve got a brain. He was staring at you, a lot, if that helps.”

He huffs out a breath then sits up. “Kinda. I should just go. I’ve actually got shit to do today.”

She frowns. “Jared. Don’t let it get you too much, yeah? Maybe this thing at his house will do something?”

“Yeah, maybe no one will show up and we can be lame party throwers together.” They laugh before he kisses her forehead. “I’ll call you about Saturday. Let you know if there’s a height requirement at the entrance.”

Sandy rolls her eyes. “You’re so funny.”

As Jared stands, he swipes a hand over her head but then sees Mike and Jensen across the quad and he waves at them. They both give quick waves in return and he heads in the other direction, trying to not worry about Saturday.

****

X + X + X + X + X

The party is like any other house party Jared’s been to, except he’s not nervous about knocking into things because it’s a college house with nothing of major value and there are no parents to worry about coming home early. He sticks by Sandy after Chad ditched them to find some girls from his communications class, and they wind up drinking faster than either had planned. They huddle into a corner, just laughing and talking like they have since the early days of high school when they were stuck in honors classes together. They’re a few beers deep when he spots Jensen working his way through the dining room. Jared raises a hand to wave and Jensen smiles in return, slowly moving through the crowd to get closer. 

“Hey, you made it,” Jensen says as he slaps at Jared’s shoulder. 

Jared nods fast, trying to not worry about the wash of alcohol passing over his head. “Yeah, of course.”

“Hey, Jensen,” Sandy beams as she pats at Jensen’s stomach. “Good turn out.”

He smirks at Jared. “Yeah, some of us know how to throw a party.”

Jared laughs, “Oh fuck off. We still had a good time.”

Jensen’s hand squeezes at Jared’s shoulder. “Yeah, we did.” He turns to Sandy. “You okay? Need another beer or anything? Maybe a highchair?”

She laughs but still pushes at his stomach. “Funny. Now I see why you two get along so well.”

They share a quick smile. Jensen quickly says, “I’m gonna check on the keg, but you guys get whatever else you need okay?”

Jared watches Jensen walk away, and then how he’s suddenly taken over by a girl with long brown hair and a giant smile as they hug and she kisses the side of his face. They peck and then walk off while Jensen keeps an arm around her shoulders and it’s in that instant that his stomach turns and he thinks he might throw up.

****

X + X + X + X + X

It’s at least five beers later, maybe even ten, when Jared finds himself in the basement bathroom, sitting on the toilet with Sandy in his lap. She’s grinding down on him and working his mouth with her own, but still trying to talk. “I’m sorry, Jare. He is super adorable.”

His hands hold her close so he can get the right friction and pretend that her frail, little body is someone with more mass and strength. He’s too drunk to care that it isn’t Jensen … well, no, he really does care it’s not. But it’s like every other party when they’re too drunk to say no and just want a quick little mess. “He’s super straight, whatever,” he grumbles as she looks down to his lap to undo jeans. 

“You really wanna do this?” she asks quietly and stills.

He breathes heavy and closes his eyes. Mostly to stop the spinning of his head but also to just think, because they’ve never gone this far, but they’ve also never been this drunk.

“Jared, I don’t think we should.”

His head tips back and his voice is strangled. “I just need to … something. Something other than my own fucking hand.”

“You hate vaginas.”

And with that, he feels everything soften around the edges, including his dick. He pushes his head to the wall behind him. “It’s a hole,” he mutters and tries to still his brain from turning over itself. He is really way too gone right now. 

She pushes at his face as she tries to stand. “You’re such a charmer.”

Jared sighs then hugs her against him. “I’m sorry. I … ” He huffs and then angrily laughs at himself. “I can’t believe we were gonna do this in the bathroom.”

She laughs. “Not exactly anywhere else to.”

“Maybe we shouldn’t do this anymore.”

Sandy leans back and combs fingers through his hair, and it feels good but not good enough. His frown matches hers. “Maybe not.”

He stumbles from the bathroom a few seconds after she left. And he staggers a few more steps when he spots Jensen looking between Sandy and where he stands in the doorway. Jared just scratches at his ear and moves on to the stairs and does his best to find someone else to talk to. 

It’s Mike, and the guy’s leading a group with beer bongs, chanting each participant on with the power of a drill sergeant. “Come on you pussies!” he yells. “Suck it like you did during hazing week!”

When Jared gets near, he’s laughing and claps Mike on the back.

“What’s up?” Mike smirks.

“What the fuck are you doing?” he asks while watching five guys holding the funnels high above their heads and gulping down as much beer as a bunch of girls can pour. 

“I hate fratboys, you have no idea.” When they look at each other, Mike’s laughing again. “C’mon pussbuckets! I don’t wanna see you spit anything. I know you like to swallow!” His voice lowers to a normal level when he looks to Jared again. “Jensen find you? He was looking around.”

“No, I saw him – ”

Mike cuts him off like he suddenly remembered something. “Dude, why’d you tell him you were with Sandy? I thought she was your hag or some shit?”

“She is,” he says with confusion, then he groans when he thinks of Jensen seeing them in the quad. And then just minutes ago when they came out of the bathroom. But then he curses himself for caring. Jensen’s straight, and with that girl he had his arm around half the night. “What’s it matter?”

“Huh?” Mike asks then sees Jared eyeing Jensen with that same girl again. “She’s – ” But then Mike looks at the beer pong guys who are finally done chugging beer but stumbling around. He shouts at them, “You fuckers better not hurl. I swear to God, these are brand new Chucks and I will punch each one of you in the neck.”

Jared chuckles but then frowns and feels so entirely drunk, too far gone to really enjoy anything but his bed. He exits fairly quietly and gets Sandy so they can head out together. They walk the ten minutes back to campus in relative quiet. When he sees she’s crossing her arms tightly against her chest, he hauls her in close and rubs her arm. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t,” she says with warning, but also a smile. “We’ll just chalk it up to any other night and not you trying to pretend I was something else.”

“You deserve better.”

“Than my gaybag trying to screw me in a bathroom? Yeah, I do.”

He laughs with her and kisses the top of her head. 

****

X + X + X + X + X

Jared spends most of Sunday in bed, recovering along with Chad from massive hangovers. He’s focusing more on that than on Jensen or the fact that he’ll see him in Calc while trying to not think about the bathroom incident, but he still feels awful about it. The guilt for what happened with Sandy nags him more than he cares to admit so he decides to go see her. 

He stretches out on her bed while she sits at the desk with her feet crossed beneath her. “How you feelin’ today?” she asks, barely looking him in the face.

“Awful.”

“We drank a lot.”

Jared scrubs his hands over his face. “Yeah, that, too.”

“Jare,” she says gently.

When he looks up, her head is down and he sighs. “Yeah, I know.” He stretches a leg out, foot tapping at her knee for attention.

Sandy’s mouth twists like she’s not feeling so great but she’s trying to smile. “Whether you have a chance with Jensen or not, we shouldn’t’ve done it.”

“You’re right, I know,” he sighs.

“I don’t think we should mess around when one of us is like this.”

“Like what?”

She carefully says, “You really like him.” 

Jared sighs again, covering his face. “That was like the world’s worst party.”

“Wasn’t that bad.” He looks at her sharply and she amends. “Okay, it was. You did want to have sex in the _basement_ bathroom. Not even a nice one off one of the bedrooms.”

He chuckles awkwardly. “I’m not gonna live that down will I?”

She pats his foot. “As much as I’d love to make fun of you for that, it’s one of my lesser moments, too.”

When she smiles a bit nicer and with less guilt, Jared lets out a breath that’s more to calm him than in annoyance. “I’m sorry,” he says rather pathetically.

With a nod, she gives a sad smile. “Me, too. I know how you feel about him. You’ll find someone …”

“Plenty of gays in the sea?”

Sandy smirks and pats his foot again. “Not sure it’s _plenty_ but there must be some, right?”

He rolls his eyes. “Somewhere.” Jared gets to his feet, not sure what else he can really say in the moment and knows he’s leaving with it still a bit awkward. But he’s had enough of reliving the night before. He’s about to make an excuse to head out, but she raises a hand.

“I’ll see you Thursday,” she nods then gives a small, comforting smile when he nods back.

****

X + X + X + X + X

Mike doesn’t say much the next morning when they walk to class, but when both Jensen and Jared are quiet in class, Mike nudges Jared. “What’s your deal?”

“Nuthin’,” he mumbles back. “Just tired.”

After class, Jensen excuses himself to an errand at the bookstore and Jared and Mike are left alone on the walk out of the math and science building. “Guy, you’re fucked up. Even when you’re quiet, you’re still anxious. Now you’re neither. What’s the problem?”

“It’s nothing,” he quickly says. “I’m just tired. Think I’m still hungover.”

Mike laughs and pats his back, harder than needed just for fun. “That was an awesome party. Jensen throws the best shit.”

“Yeah,” Jared says lamely.

****

X + X + X + X + X

Wednesday, it’s much the same. Jared’s quiet and ignores most of the conversations around him, even when Mike tries to include him. He gets himself out of it when he sees Sandy across the courtyard that connects their building with the technology center. “I’ll see ya back at the dorms,” he says with a small smile. 

“Dude,” Mike argues with a hand out. “I thought we were getting lunch!” His voice gets louder as Jared gets further away. “It’s sloppy joes!”

Jared just waves them off and continues on his way. 

****

X + X + X + X + X

It’s Friday that it’s hard to ignore. Just before class starts, Mike leans in close and asks quietly, “Are you gay?”

“Are you kidding me?”

Mike goes on, with the same oddly level voice. “First time I met you, Chad introduced you as the Big Gay Roommate.”

“And?”

“So are you or aren’t you?”

Jared stares and asks quietly, “You’re suddenly caring now?”

Mike starts, “You know,” then he stops when the teacher calls attention to the class. The room falls quiet as he starts writing equations across the wipeboard and introduces new formulas and rules. Mike scribbles in his notebook then tears the piece of paper out and pushes it onto Jared’s desk.

It reads, _Are you really gay?_

Jared writes back, _Yeah, but I’m not sucking your dick._

_Jensen won’t either._

He looks over at Mike, who’s faking attention to the front of the class. Jared can’t manage an answer, not even sure what’s going on but Mike leans closer and scribbles more. It’s then that Jensen turns to them and Jared stares for a few moments as they share a long look until Mike sits back and blocks the view. He glances down and Mike’s added _He’s gay, asshole. Thought you were with Sandy._

Jared stares at Mike this time, and Mike looks at him from the corner of his eye. Jared quickly writes _Chick at the party? All over each other?_

_Like you and Sandy?_

He swallows and it’s hard and loud, he can hear it clearly. Jared tips his head back and closes his eyes, not able to pay attention to anything in this moment. Not the teacher or the assignment being given, not Mike or the paper with the revelations that are making his heart race. He pushes his elbows over the notes, hangs his head, and pushes the heels of his hands into his eyes. The pain is appreciated right now because it gives him something else to focus on. He stays in this position for the rest of class, not caring that he’s missing instructions for homework or an update on the quiz schedule. He barely knows class is over until Mike is up and patting his back as he says, “I gotta get something from my Stats TA. I’ll catch ya later.”

Jared wants to groan because he’s certain it’s Mike’s way to leave them alone, but he still doesn’t move.

“You okay?” Jensen asks quietly, standing in front of him. 

He sighs and looks up with hot eyes. Not that he’d cry, but they feel so tired and burn a little from all the pressure of his hands pushing against them for the last twenty minutes. Jared frowns. “I guess.”

“You heading out?”

Jared’s head falls down again and he combs fingers through his hair then pushes it off his forehead when he looks up again. “I’m not with Sandy.”

Jensen stares for a few moments then clears his throat. “Okay.”

“I don’t talk about girls because I don’t _like_ girls.”

The corner of Jensen’s mouth twitches then he takes a deep breath and looks around the room. Jared does the same and there are still a few students chatting about next week’s test or the latest homework assignment. “You were in my bathroom with her.”

Jared pushes himself back in his seat and stares at the ceiling. “I know.”

There’s shuffling of papers at his desk and he fears Jensen seeing Mike’s note, but he just pushes things together and gives Jared a small, strained smile. “We can’t sit here all day long. Don’t know about you, but I’ve got better things to do.”

They make it outside and are walking, Jared idly following, trying to think of anything else to say. 

But Jensen saves him the trouble when he asks, “You missed the assignment, didn’t you?”

Jared tugs on the straps of his backpack and takes a deep breath. “Yeah. I was too busy wallowing in my own desperation.”

“What?” Jensen laughs. 

“I didn’t know you were gay until Mike spelled it out on my notes.”

Jensen snorts and keeps walking, leading them off campus before Jared can tell where they’re headed. “Funny. That was the first thing he told me.” His voice changes to mock Mike. “Jared’s gay, so have at it.”

Jared laughs then stops when he realizes they’re on Jensen’s block. “I didn’t even – ”

He nods forward. “Why don’t you come by and I’ll go over the assignment with you? The instructions are kinda strange.”

A weight is lifted from his head and shoulders and back, and he feels light. Like knowing that Jensen is gay and interested makes everything in life so much easier. He doesn’t have to think about how to best answer without seeming too anxious or how to nudge his way closer to Jensen. He can just honestly answer, “Yeah, that sounds good.”

Jensen nods again, but firmly this time. “Alright,” he smiles as they continue on to his house. Once inside, he hands over a can of soda and takes a healthy sip himself. 

Jared looks around then chuckles. “Looks a bit nicer without a hundred people crowded in.”

He smirks and looks around as well. “Yeah, doesn’t hurt that Chris and Steve pay for the clean-up.”

“I didn’t even meet your roommates. There were so many people here.”

“Probably a good thing,” he nods then frowns. “I’m sure you will, though.”

Jared nods and smiles around his can as he takes another drink. 

Jensen leans back against the kitchen table and suddenly looks uncomfortable. “So, what’s the deal with Sandy then?”

He swallows and frowns. “I don’t know. High school friend who can kiss?”

There’s a tiny laugh then Jensen’s nodding and looking down on his feet as they cross over each other. 

“What about,” he starts awkwardly while Jensen looks up to him. “What about the girl you were hanging with?”

“Grew up with her. She was in town to visit.”

Jared nods then steels himself to finally ask. “So, to be official … You’re gay?”

Jensen chuckles. “Yeah, I am. And you are, too.”

He nods again and figures as long as they’re clearing the air, he might as well do it spectacularly. “I’ve liked you since like day one.”

His mouth curls slowly and he stands with a small chuckle. “Yeah. I think the basketball game sealed it for me.”

“Oh, God, I was so embarrassed you have no idea,” Jared lets out in a quick breath but he feels like he can finally talk freely. It’s wonderful. 

Jensen laughs. “Yeah, that was kinda … kinda strange? I don’t know,” he says shaking his head. “But yeah. It’s kinda funny now.”

“Sure, for you.”

“I had your dick at my ass in front of all our friends.”

Jared nearly chokes on his soda but then laughs when he sees Jensen look a bit embarrassed at the words. 

Jensen eases into a smile then motions for Jared’s can, “Here,” and puts it on the table next to his. Then he reaches for his wrists and brings him closer before holding him at his jaw. He smirks. “Wanted to do this since Wal Mart.”

Jared pauses for a moment then smiles. “You really know how to woo a guy.”

With a laugh, Jensen brings him closer. “Shut up.” He presses his mouth up and they move together, fitting perfectly and slowly sucking on lips as Jared holds Jensen’s hips and leans even closer. 

Jared is the first to nudge his tongue forward, tasting Jensen’s lips and catching the remnants of root beer on his mouth, and so he smiles into the kiss. And then he feels Jensen smiling right back and pushing his tongue out to touch, tentatively at first before he draws Jared closer and sucks his tongue in. Jared follows and realizes that Jensen is now his to kiss and he doesn’t want to know anything else. 

He barely realizes there’s noise in the house but then distinctly hears someone call out, “Jenny!” 

Jensen groans as he pulls away and closes his eyes. “What?” 

“You ready?”

When Jensen’s roommates come into the kitchen, they’ve separated, but the guys zero in on wet, red mouths and snicker before one leaves the room. The other has a high eyebrow and Jensen grumbles, “Jared, Steve. Steve, Jared.”

The eyebrow goes even higher and Jared’s kind of impressed with that. “Jared, Jared?”

Jared sees how Jensen rolls his eyes, but he smiles and moves closer to shake Steve’s hand. “Nice to meet you.”

“Aww,” Steve playfully coos then pinches Jared’s cheek before he can move away. “He’s so polite and adorable.”

“This is why I’m glad you didn’t meet him.” Jensen shoves Steve away. “Give me two minutes and I’ll be ready.”

“Man, you have absolutely no staying power.”

“Fuck off,” Jensen says with a smile like this is their casual banter. He motions for Jared to follow him to the front door.

When they get to the porch, Jared doesn’t even wait for Jensen to say a word, he marches on quickly. “Do you wanna go out tonight? Get dinner or something?”

“Something sounds fun,” Jensen says with humor. 

He just smirks. “I can come get you at 6:30?”

“Why do you get to do the picking up?”

“Trying to save you from Chad.”

He laughs and shakes his head. “I have lab until six. I’ll just swing by after.”

“Okay, yeah,” Jared beams then moves a little closer, wanting to kiss him again. He stutters a little when he’s not sure he should push it. He takes a deep breath and shifts away. But he’s surprised when Jensen grabs him by the shirt and pulls him in, kissing again, not as slow as the kitchen, just nice and easy and Jared follows right with him. When they pull away, he smiles. “Thank you,” he says on an exhale. 

Jensen laughs again and pats at his chest. “I’ll see you later.”

Jared nods quickly as he walks down the steps. The edge of his flip flop catches on the last step and he stumbles onto the sidewalk. He gives a nervous smile when he rights himself, but they’re both chuckling at the whole thing. “I swear I’ll wear my walking shoes.”

“Good idea.”

He gives a short wave and as soon as he’s out of view, he whips his cell out and texts Sandy. _jensens gay and we kissed and we’re dating i think_

_you think?!_

His fingers are catching so many wrong buttons because he’s hysterical over this development, but he finally responds. _getting dinner tonight and he kissed me twice TWICE_

Sandy calls him seconds later and he fills her in with the whole story, laughing and smiling his way back to the dorm.

****

X + X + X + X + X

Jared stares in the mirror then turns to one side and the other. “This look okay? I don’t wanna be obvious. Like I’m trying too hard.”

Chad doesn’t turn from the TV screen, just continues lounging in his bed. “The fact that you’re asking me says you’re trying too hard.”

He frowns and takes off the black button up, replacing it with a soft brown sweater that Sandy always pets. He knows he looks good in it. He moves into Chad’s eyeline. “C’mon. Just tell me. Too much?”

“You’re just the right amount of homo.”

There’s a quick knock at the open doorway and Jared smiles nervously at Jensen, who’s in the same navy polo and tattered jeans from earlier in the day. “Hey, what’s up?” Jared asks with a smile.

Jensen gives him an odd look then smirks. “Nothing. Bored as hell. Thought I’d see what’s going on here.”

Jared chuckles and grabs his wallet, phone, and keys, figuring he can’t change now without being obvious.

As he gets close to the door, Jensen murmurs, “You look nice.”

He turns for a second to hide his blush. “Thanks.” Then he calls out to Chad, “See ya later.”

“Later gays.”

In the hallway, Jensen says, “On the upside, he makes you look normal.”

Jared elbows him as they stop in front of the elevators. “Oh, shut up.”

Jensen looks him over then absently rubs a hand over the front of his own shirt. “Maybe I should’ve let you come get me. I’m a slob.”

He’s shaking his head in an instant and says, “No, you always look good,” before he can think it through. Jared swallows and looks at the elevator, praying for it to hurry. 

“And to think, we wasted two months.”

Jared looks over and then smiles when Jensen grins. “Sometimes I need it spelled out.”

He nods. “I’ve noticed.”

As they step into the elevator, Jared says, “You really weren’t that obvious, though.”

“Uh, I stripped down in your brother’s pool.”

Jared clears his throat. “Well, yeah. But – ”

“And then hung out with you in my underwear, without complaining. Even if the beer and pizza was shitty.”

He frowns a little then looks guilty. “If I’d known it was just you showing up, I would’ve wined and dined you.”

“I think Mike thought you’d call the whole thing off.”

Jared is quiet and just watches Jensen, even when the doors open on the main floor and he’s exiting the box. He follows Jensen a few steps later. “What do you mean?”

Seconds later they’re outside and Jensen says, “They bailed. Mike told me to just go.”

He stares at him, not even knowing what to say. But he finally says, “But you didn’t … didn’t make a move or whatever.”

Jensen shrugs awkwardly. “You weren’t exactly doing it either.”

“You knew I was gay.”

He shrugs again. “Just because we’re both gay doesn’t automatically mean you’d like me.”

With a quick surge, Jared moves in and kisses him, holding his face and pushing his tongue in, because he can now and he never wants to not be able to. Especially when he feels Jensen’s hands at his hips, squeezing and moving to his back, pulling him forward so they’re chest to chest. 

“God, you are nauseating,” they hear and break apart, only to laugh when Mike comes jogging up the steps. He’s smirking, but it’s not as cocky as it usually is. And he doesn’t bug them further, just keeps going, shooting a small smile as he goes into the building. 

****

X + X + X + X + X

Dinner lasts nearly three hours while they talk excessively and drink more than either intended, but not all too much. They’re not just comparing all the mental notes of the last two months of them moving around each other, but also about school and other classes, their families and childhoods. Neither go overboard with details, but there’s enough there to make the other laugh and it’s obvious how there is so much interest from Jensen that Jared’s beaming most of the time. Between Jensen leaning across the table and getting animated when they’re recounting Mike’s ridiculous scams and pranks and the way his eyes only leave Jared’s to subtly check him out, Jared’s stomach is hot and turning over itself in such a good way that he refuses to move except for the bathroom. 

When they finally leave, they’re walking close and Jared can see Jensen’s small smile as they continue talking about their calc class and the teacher who loves tormenting them with hints of pop quizzes but never issues any. 

At the center of campus, Jared realizes this is the split between his dorm and Jensen’s house. He smiles at Jensen and nods. “I had a really great time.”

He nods right back and moves in with a low voice. “Yeah, me, too.” Then they’re kissing again and Jared _seriously_ doesn’t want to ever not be able to do this, because Jensen’s tongue is curling right over his and pushing further and further inside. Jared holds him close and kisses back with just as much push in his mouth and tongue. Jensen’s hands are in his hair, pushing and pulling and Jared’s fingernails drag along the back of his neck, into the short brush of hair there. It all swirls through his brain and buzzes in his ear, and Jared keeps going, tasting and teasing and just kissing. Jensen breaks suddenly then huffs out, “You wanna come over?”

“Really?”

“Well, I don’t wanna run into Chad when we’re like this.”

Jared laughs, sure that their mouths are puckered red and that his hair’s a mess. “Yeah, ‘sides, it’s like rule number one to not have sex in there.”

“Really?” Jensen laughs.

He shakes his head, laughing, too, not even sure why he admitted it, but at least it’s funny to Jensen. “We haven’t determined exactly what is allowed yet. But I’ll get it in writing.”

Jensen smirks. “Yeah. That will be helpful.” Jared chuckles and moves in but Jensen stops him and says with a soft voice, “Come over.”

“Yeah, yeah, of course,” he murmurs as he kisses him again. 

****

X + X + X + X + X

His back hits a door and it’s then that he realizes they’ve been making out the whole way into the house, up stairs, and into Jensen’s bedroom. He’s on the bed with Jensen hovering over him, mouth bitten dark and falling open as he stares down on Jared. Jensen’s knees press into Jared’s thighs as he settles closer and swipes a hand over Jared’s head, pushing hair out of his eyes. Jared’s hands slip under his shirt, rubbing along bare skin before settling at Jensen’s lower back. Jensen leans in close with his hand curling over the top of Jared’s head, and he’s faintly smiling. “God,” he whispers, mouth right up to Jared’s and eyes staying with his. “You’re so …”

He doesn’t finish, and Jared’s not sure what he wants to say, but Jared’s sure he feels pretty much the same way. Jensen is gorgeous and funny and kind and full of character and is right above him looking so fantastic. “You, too,” he says back, finishing with a sucking kiss. 

They’re kissing again and Jared can’t figure out where to put his hands, they roam Jensen’s entire back. But when Jensen pushes himself down into Jared’s groin, he whimpers and dips fingers down the back of Jensen’s jeans. They touch soft skin that curves up and then they press in tight to bring Jensen even closer as they start moving against each other, neither caring that their jeans are blocking so much. Because it’s been months now that they’ve been crushing on the other and they are finally touching _somewhere_, so they keep going. 

Jared shifts his legs out, bringing Jensen back between them so they line up just right and move faster. He goes so far as to dig his heels into the mattress, pushes himself up into Jensen and there’s more moaning, and it goes on like this for so long that he’s not even sure which ones belong to him and which are Jensen’s. But then they’re both breathing heavy and can barely manage tongues in the kisses, so he knows they’re both close. Then it’s painfully obvious how close they are when Jensen grinds down harder and quicker and moves up as he comes, knocking Jared’s temple as he groans. 

He chuckles a little and then he’s rutting up, hands still down the back of Jensen’s pants and pulling him tight. Jared twitches and wraps his legs around Jensen’s hips as he shakes again and comes. Jensen’s breathing loud in his ear with little groaning noises but then he’s sucking along Jared’s jaw, working his way to the chin then up to his mouth so they kiss, all lazy and slow. 

When Jensen moves away, he groans again and pulls at the waistband of his pants and boxers, trying to separate them from his skin before the come dries. He flops onto his back and does it again while looking down into his pants. “Seemed like a good idea at the time.”

Jared laughs and shifts closer so he can look down the pants, too, catching sight of the very tip of Jensen and he sighs, closing his eyes. He moves closer and drapes himself across Jensen’s chest and kisses him. “It was a good idea.” Jared moves his mouth to Jensen’s chin then down his throat and saying, “I used to watch you chew your pencil. And the way you gulped at hard problems. And you’d scratch your neck.”

Jensen’s hand slips into his hair, holding him close while tipping his head back for better access. “Fuck,” he mumbles when Jared sucks on his Adam’s apple, but it also sounds like a true curse because he continues, “_Really_ wish I knew.”

He moves back into view and smirks. “If you didn’t know before, it’s kind of obvious now.”

His hand falls to the back of Jared’s neck and holds him steady. “Extremely obvious.” They kiss a bit more then Jensen shifts and spreads his legs with a whine. “I think I gotta get out of these.” Jared just smirks in return, which prompts Jensen to smile, too. “How about I wash our clothes and we wash up in the shower?”

Jared doesn’t even bother pretending to think. “Uh, yeah.”

In the shower, Jensen soaps Jared up and then uses the lather to aid in the slick of his fist over Jared’s dick, and Jared returns the favor. They’re pushed together tight inside the tub with the shower pelting down on Jared’s back, and the hands are moving faster and faster while they kiss and lick away water and sweat from mouths and jaws and necks. Jared watches his hand cover Jensen’s dick as he jacks him off, bringing him to the edge of his orgasm and continues watching as Jensen spills over his hand. Jensen continues stroking, yet slows down as he tries to piece himself back together. Though Jared doesn’t care, because Jensen’s still right there and Jared’s smug with the knowledge that he did this to Jensen. 

When the clothes are done and they’ve watched enough bad late night TV to bore them over, Jared dresses and suddenly feels nervous that this is the end of this night. Jensen pulls on another pair of jeans and a hooded sweatshirt. “I’ll walk you back,” he smiles. “Hate to think of you walking home all alone.”

It’s only ten minutes, but Jared plays along. “I don’t know how I’d ever defend myself.”

“Well, you won’t have to find out, ‘cause I’ll be there.”

When they get to his dorm, there’s more kissing and Jared numbly says between kisses, “Should walk you back. Don’t want anything to happen to you.” Jensen laughs into his mouth and finally breaks away. Jared smirks. “By the way? Best date ever.”

“Oh, good,” Jensen jokes with a sigh. “I was really worried you weren’t enjoying yourself.”

“It was debatable. But then the shower kinda helped.”

“Yeah, it did,” Jensen murmurs as he kisses him again.

“You’ve got some really good soap. Fragrant.”

Jensen laughs and pushes Jared away. “Okay. We need to separate at some time.”

“No, we don’t,” Jared whines, bringing Jensen close again. “Finally got you. Don’t wanna let go.”

“Oh, God, you’re co-dependent, aren’t you?”

“Chad will be happy that I found someone else to pester.”

Jensen rolls his eyes. “Right, because that’s my life’s mission.”


	3. Chapter 3

They spend the weekend together, mostly making out at Jensen’s house, but also doing homework and studying when they’re not attached to each other or wasting time in front of the TV. Jared spends Saturday night there and leaves after Jensen gives a slow-building but nicely executed blow job. 

He showers at the dorm and hangs out in his room, catching up with some reading he hadn’t brought with him the day before while Chad is doing much the same at his desk. 

Mike peeks in and calls to Chad, “You up for some ball?”

Jared looks between them as Chad offers an easy, “Yeah, what time,” without looking up from his book. 

“In an hour. We can grab lunch first.”

“It’s like I’m not even here,” Jared says. 

Chad turns and looks surprised. “I thought you were still at your homo retreat.”

“Funny,” he smirks right back. 

Jared turns to sit against the wall with his legs stretched far before him, kicking them up onto Chad’s bed. “Hey, Michael,” he starts with a highly interested voice. “Funny thing I found out. You knew Jensen was gay from day one.”

“Uh, yeah, he is one of my close friends.”

“Why couldn’t you tell me before? Could’ve saved me _so _much fucking time.”

“So much fucking _time_ or so much _fucking_ time?” Chad asks. 

“Like you care?”

“I really don’t,” Chad nods and goes back to his laptop.

Mike shoots him a glance. “I did tell you. Two days ago. And look at you little schoolgirls now, huh?”

“Could’ve told me _ages_ ago.”

“Whatever,” he shakes his head with a chuckle. “I’m not your gay cupid.”

Jared grumbles, but there’s hardly any heat in it because he does finally have Jensen to himself. 

“Aww,” Mike coos, pinching at Jared’s cheek. “You’re in wuv,” and then he slaps the cheek.

“Ow, fucker!” Jared reaches up to hit Mike, but then he laughs because he seriously couldn’t be angry about this anymore.

Chad looks over his shoulder and calls to Mike. “If I walk in on them buttfucking on my bed, you’re gonna be a dead gay cupid.” Jared laughs but Chad just reminds him, “Rule One, rimrod.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” he waves off then looks to Mike. “When we playing?”

“_We’re _playing in an hour.”

“How’m I not invited?”

Chad shot out, “Because you’re gonna be up Jensen’s ass in like half an hour I’m sure.”

“That’d be awesome.”

“Oh, fuck you,” Chad complains. “Now I’m seeing it.”

“So’m I,” Jared smirks, tossing his things aside then rubbing over Chad’s head. “Thank you for your assistance.”

****

X + X + X + X + X

“You’re like a puppy that won’t leave,” Jensen says when he sees Jared at his front door. 

“I know, poor you.”

“I do have homework to do,” he complains even while smiling. 

Jared leans against the screendoor and runs his finger along the screen. “I’ll blow you after every assignment. Like an incentive.”

He groans and tips his head back. “Like I could even concentrate now.”

Pushing off the door, he smirks. “See, now you have plenty of time to mess around.”

While messing around, Jared starts to wonder if he’s really as much the anxious teenager that he feels when Jensen is sprawled out below him. Because he gets so excited to be this close to him and to be kissing and tasting and rubbing that he can’t manage patience and make anything last longer than hand jobs or oral sex. Not that he’s complaining, but he kind of wants to get to the _really_ good stuff. And he’s thinking exactly that while sucking on Jensen, with Jensen’s hands in his hair, guiding him up and down. Jared’s about to pull off so they can go further, but then Jensen’s hands clamp down on his head and push him down for a few more movements before he’s panting, “Oh, God, yes, yes, Jare,” and then he comes and Jared drinks it all down. 

“One of these times we’re gonna do more than just this,” Jared pouts but his eyes betray his happiness.

“One of these times you’re gonna let me finish my homework.”

Jared shakes his head and kisses Jensen, messy and noisy. “Never.”

“I’m gonna fail all my classes.”

“More time for me,” he smirks back.

****

X + X + X + X + X

Jared knows that everything is going to be different now. He has a boyfriend – yeah, he knows it’s early to say but considering how much they like each other and have spent two, three months dancing around each other, he thinks it’s fair to use the title – and they have class together and they’ve just spent nearly every waking hour (and some sleeping) of the last weekend. He’s trying to not make it a deal. But he does stutter a few steps when Mike still walks ahead of him to sit next to Jensen. When Jared sits in his normal chair, he grumbles, “I’m gonna pass him notes the entire time.”

“Are you in junior high?” Mike asks. 

“Shut up.”

“No, seriously,” he says, getting a little louder. “Are you such a little baby that you can’t spend an hour without touching each other?”

Jensen sighs. “He really can’t. It’s disgusting.”

Jared leans forward and glares. “Shut up. I’m using my teeth next time.”

Mike raises his hands, “Okay, unnecessary.”

“Yeah, teeth are very unnecessary,” Jensen points out.

At the end of class, Mike rolls his eyes at them, seeing how they keep looking at each other even when they’re not saying anything and just busy putting their backpacks together. “You kids are gonna put me in a coma,” he shakes his head as he leaves and heads back to the dorm on his own. 

Jensen leads the way to a mostly abandoned courtyard by the liberal arts facility and they make out in the grass between just hanging out and talking, and Jared is nearly sickened when he can’t stop holding Jensen’s hand and looking at it in his own. But he _really_ fucking likes him, and loves that he can finally touch him without being afraid of what Jensen would think. 

****

X + X + X + X + X

Jensen’s laugh is unmistakable and draws Jared from the quiet of his room, given that Chad has left him alone to go out with some girl from his biology class. Jared has an inordinate amount of research to do for his sociology paper, but it doesn’t matter when he knows Jensen’s nearby. 

When he gets into the hallway, he doesn’t see anyone, but there is a burst of damaging noise from around the corner then bouts of laughter. He finds Misha and Jensen in Mike and Tom’s room, bent over in near tears while Mike and Tom are wrestling on the floor. Tom keeps rolling onto Mike’s back, but Mike just gets up on his knees and forces the guy off. At one point, Mike calls out, “J, dude, help me out?”

Misha and Jensen turn to the door and Jared flashes an awkward smile before answering, “I’m not gettin’ in the middle of your lover’s spat.”

“Fuck off,” Tom complains as he moves away from Mike. 

Jared settles closer to Jensen, puts a hand at his back. “Hey,” he says lamely, not sure how he wants to broach the whole ‘being-on-my-floor-but-not-stopping-by’ thing. 

“Didn’t know you were home,” Jensen says with a smile, still laughing at his friends. “Door was closed.”

“I was studying.”

“Good thing I didn’t interrupt.” Then Jensen makes a face and scratches his head as he looks at the others for a moment. “Not buggin’ you, are we?”

“Nah. I just heard you.” He adds on “you guys,” when he realizes how pathetic it is that he’s singled out Jensen’s laughter from everyone else’s. “Thought I’d see what was up.”

“Well, at the moment, Tom and Mike are fighting over …” He smirks at Jared. “I seriously don’t know anymore, but there was fighting.”

“Yeah, I heard.” When Jensen moves closer to the guys and starts talking about something that happened last year and was apparently _hysterical_, Jared smirks and quietly excuses himself.

He sits back at his desk and hovers over open textbooks, trying to focus on the words. But it’s not a full minute before there’s a knock at the door and Jensen pops his head in. “You decent?”

Jared doesn’t look up from his reading. “Wish I wasn’t, don’t ya?” 

“Maybe a little.”

He does look up at that. “Just a little?”

Jensen leans against Jared’s back, hands squeezing at his shoulders. “What’re you researchin’?”

“Officially?”

“Yeah.”

He takes a quick breath. “Socially acceptable violence in movies in opposition to real life crime.”

“You just wanna watch a shit ton of movies.”

Jared laughs and looks up to Jensen. “That was the plan, except jackass teacher insists on at least five different print sources.”

Jensen laughs back at him and pats his head. “You poor tortured soul.” He drops down to Chad’s bed and kicks his feet up on Jared’s. “This place looks different without Chad here.”

“Yeah, and it’s quieter.”

“Where’s he at?”

“Some chick from class.”

Jensen laughs. “Just some class?”

He turns in his chair and stares. “You talk a lot about Chad. Ever realize that?”

“Easy target,” he replies with his eyes taking in the whole, small space. “How far’ve got with the paper?”

“Just started.”

“When’s it due?”

He works his mouth then throws a hand through his hair. “On Tuesday.”

“Ouch,” Jensen laughs. “You’re a bit behind.”

“Yeah, well, this douchebag Jensen keeps me out all hours of the night,” he says with a smile.

Jensen chuckles and stands while swiping a hand over Jared’s head. “I’ll leave you be then.”

As Jensen turns away, Jared catches his wrist and pulls him back. “Didn’t say that.” He tugs Jensen down so he can kiss him, licking into Jensen’s mouth. 

Misha knocks at the open door with a smirk. “Like you don’t do that enough already?”

Mike pushes Misha out of the way and smiles at them. “You two gonna make out all night or you gonna come play?”

“What’re you – ” Jared stops when he sees Tom coasting right by the door. He’s more alarmed when there’s a distinct crash seconds later. 

By the time Jensen and Jared get to the doorway, Misha and Mike have taken off to the left in a quick sprint on rollerblades, curling around the nearest corner and passing Tom, who’s in the fetal position on the ground. 

“Think you’re losing, Welling,” Jensen calls out with a laugh. 

“I thought he was still crippled?” Jared asks.

Jensen laughs. “His ankle? Yeah, he is. But he’s got enough Vicodin to knock out a bull.”

“So that’s what’s with all them? They sharing meds?”

He shakes his head as he watches the guys take another lap around the floor. “Nah, just Tom. Misha’s … Misha? And Mike’s in _love_.”

Jared stares at Jensen, confusion apparent. Especially when they can hear Mike’s maniacal laughter before he skids around the corner and skates down the hallway and past the room. “Didn’t know Mike did love.”

“Kiddin’ me? He’s a sap for all kinds.”

He stares again and then watches for Mike again. He turns back to Jensen with a smirk. “If he’s such a sap how the hell didn’t he tell me about you earlier?”

Jensen shrugs and watches them pass, Misha leading with Mike hanging onto the tail of his shirt as Tom stutters his footing in trying too hard to catch up. “He’s kind of a sadist,” he says with a light tone, but then it goes a bit more firm. “He’s Mike, you really need an explanation?”

Jared leans against the doorframe and casually rests his foot behind Jensen’s. “Better late than never, I guess.”

He smirks in return then crosses his arms. “Either way, he’s got someone.” Misha then Tom zooms by and Jensen takes a deep breath. “I don’t know who. Just know there’s something.”

“I haven’t seen him with anyone that isn’t one of us.”

Jensen pokes his head into the hallway while holding onto the doorframe, waiting for the next lap to pass them. “Me neither. It’s about time, though. He broke up with James ages ago.”

“James?”

There’s a long look before Jensen smirks. “You didn’t know?”

He thinks on it, and realizes that outside of basketball, calculus, and drinking, he really doesn’t know much about Mike. Jared makes a little _hmm_ noise and watches with Jensen as Tom sprints down the hallway with Mike right behind him. Mike leaps onto Tom’s back, laughing hysterically the whole time and gripping tight while Tom fumbles with the added weight. “Tom?” Jared asks oddly then laughs when Tom yells, “Get off’a me, you fat hog!”

Shaking his head, Jensen laughs. “I really don’t think so.”

“They live together. Not out of the realm of possibility.”

His eyebrows go high as he considers it. “I guess not. But Tom’s not exactly his type.”

“Sometimes it just happens,” Jared suggests while Jensen shrugs. “You’re not exactly my type.”

Jensen looks over quickly and gives a critical eye. “What _is_ your type?” 

Jared casually watches the laps continue on. “Smart guys? Sharp dress. Tall.”

He kicks at Jared’s ankle, “Fuck you. I’m smart and tall.”

“_Ehh_,” he sounds out with a hesitant look. 

Pushing off the doorway, Jensen grunts and turns. “Alright, I can tell when I’m not wanted.”

Jared laughs at how poorly Jensen’s hiding his smile. He tugs Jensen hard enough to force him into a close hold. “Just gettin’ you back for ignoring me tonight.”

“Didn’t think you were home.”

“You didn’t even _try_.”

“Oh, you fuckers make me sick.”

Jared rolls his eyes with a pitiful, “Hey, Chad,” as he and Jensen move from the doorway to let him by. 

“Why I didn’t try?” Jensen smirks with a head nod into the room.

“Alright fine, my roommate is offensive. Old story,” he sighs.

“It’s my favorite.”

He eyes Jensen for a few moments. “I’m beginning to wonder what your fascination is. Maybe you’re using me to get into his pants.”

“I will cut my dick off first,” Chad calls out.

Jensen moves into the doorway to watch Chad land with a thud on his bed and use the remote for the TV. “Date went that well?”

He grumbles, “She brought her book. Thought it was study group.”

Jared drops in, “Did you tell her you wanted to perfect your knowledge of the human anatomy?”

“Yeah,” he says with more energy as he turns to face them. “Can you believe that shit didn’t work? She said she wanted to work on the skeleton system.”

“Well, what about your bone?” Jensen laughs.

“Fuck off,” he grunts as he turns back to the TV. Then he grumbles, “That didn’t work either.”

Jensen shakes his head and steps back into the hall. “You’re all class, man.” When there’s no more noise from their friends, he squeezes Jared’s hand. “I’ll let you get back to studying.”

Jared pulls him close. “No, c’mon.”

“I’m not gonna be responsible for you missing homework.”

“Human anatomy,” he says with a low, playful tone.

He laughs. “You’re not even in bio.”

“_This_ semester. Might need it next semester.”

“We’ll work on it then,” he says easily before dropping a quick kiss. Jared’s stomach flutters at the idea of _then_ and smiles. “Go work.” Jensen kisses him then smirks. “Might be good to see the inside of your own room now and again.”

Jared frowns. “Maybe I don’t wanna see the inside of my room.”

Jensen kisses him again. “You’ll live.”

Once Jared’s back in the room, Chad says plainly, “You homos are so gay.”

“Kind of the point.” Chad doesn’t have another comment so Jared looks over. He’s surprised to find Chad watching him. “What?”

He shrugs and then focuses on the TV. Jared’s back to his textbooks when he hears Chad say in a low voice, “Not a bad guy.”

Jared stares again and Chad won’t look at him. “I just get the Chad stamp of approval?” he asks with a smile.

“Whatever.”

His laugh is loud and bright. “Yes, I believe I did. You like Jensen.”

Chad’s voice gets hard as does his glare. “Doesn’t change a thing. Still no gay sex in here.”

“What about blow jobs?”

“Fuck you. Why’re you always talking about this shit and then _I_ have to think about it.”

He gives him a long look. “Are you thinking about _me_ getting blown or just any old guy?”

“You fucker, I’m gonna …” Chad’s up in an instant and jumping at Jared, wrestling him to the ground. “I fucking hate you and your gay mind tricks,” he grits out, but Jared knows this well enough. Chad’s not even using real power and there’s no more anger in his voice than any other conversation they’ve ever had. “If I wanted to see you getting laid, I’d pay an entry fee.”

Jared’s laughing, pulling on Chad’s short hair, yanking his head around as he turns them over and quickly takes him in a ridiculously complicated leg lock, immobilizing Chad’s lower body. “You’d have to pay top dollar to see me and Jensen.”

Chad gives up fighting and just smacks Jared in the head. “Fine, whatever,” he huffs. “You’re in big gay love.”

He releases Chad, slowly moving away. “And you like Jensen,” he nearly sing songs.

With another huff, Chad settles back on his bed. “You could do worse. You _have_ done worse.”

“I think that’s a compliment?” Jared laughs. Then he beams as he goes back to his books.

****

X + X + X + X + X

Every week, Jared and Jensen meet up between classes, even hanging with Sandy on Thursdays like Jared has done all semester. Though he can tell that Jensen’s still a little awkward when they’re around other people. Jared worries about Jensen’s impression of Sandy so one weekend he tries to clear it up, and Jensen seems to understand well enough, but then Jared is distracted with Jensen’s pouty lower lip and decides to just suck on that for a while. 

One Friday, they’re stretched out on the stairs of the quad and relaxing in the hum of students moving around campus and the bright sunshine. Jared reaches out to touch the top of Jensen’s head. Jensen startles but then gives a small smile as he closes his eyes again. Jared pulls him in closer with a hand at his shoulder. He rests his head against Jensen’s and inhales, trying to be subtle when he smells shampoo, gel, and the underlying bits of Jensen that make him smile. 

“I know what you’re doing.”

“Sorry.” Jensen laughs but they’re interrupted when they first hear then see Sandy’s heels clicking down the cement stairs. “Hey!” Jared calls out and moves to watch her. “What’re you all dolled up for?”

She settles next to him, crossing her legs and tucking her skirt down so no one below will look up and see everything. “My Media Law trial. Bonus points for professionalism,” she smirks then gives Jared a high five. She looks around him to smile at Jensen. “How’re you, Jensen?”

He nods and gives a small smile.”Good.”

“How’d the trial go?” Jared quickly asks.

“I think I have to stand by my bonus points. One of my partners went on at length about the merits of legalized porn.”

“Porn is illegal?” Jared asks with humor. 

“Exactly.”

Jensen’s phone beeps and as he reads it and snorts, Jared leans in. “What’s up?”

“Chris is having people over tonight. So glad they give me ample warning.”

“Another party?” Sandy asks with a bright smile. 

Jensen glances between them. “Yeah, looks like.”

Her sweetness bubbles over when she happily says, “That’s awesome. The last one was great. I don’t know how you fit all those people in there.”

He rubs the back of his neck and smirks. “Think people find other rooms to hang out?” Turning to Jared, he leans in, pauses like he wants to say something, but then kisses quickly. “I should get some stuff cleared out before they start.”

Jared smirks. “Sure. What time should we show up?”

Jensen scratches through his hair again. “You really wanna go?”

“Yeah, of course.” He watches Jensen then tacks on, “Unless you didn’t want to?”

“No, no, it’s fine,” he quickly shoots back. “Just, after dark, whenever.” Jensen offers a quick wave to them both as he heads off. 

“Everything okay?”

Jared looks at Sandy with knotted eyebrows. “Why?”

“He shot outta here.”

Jared thinks over the last bit of time and then he groans. “What if he didn’t want me to go? If he just wanted to be with his friends?”

“Wouldn’t he just say so?”

“I don’t know. Maybe he didn’t wanna hurt my feelings? He’s always joking I’m too attached, what if he’s really thinking that? And I just invited myself over to his house with all his roommate’s friends and I’m not even really welcomed?”

Sandy flicks an eyebrow. “You need to calm down.”

He inhales sharply. “I know. I know. I just can’t. I don’t wanna mess this up.”

“You keep fussin’ like this and you will.”

Jared glares at her. “That’s not really helping.”

“What do you want me to say?” she laughs.

“That he really likes me, too, and there’s no way I can mess it up.”

Her mouth quirks and she says, “He really likes you, too, and there’s no way you can mess it up.”

“Surprisingly? Doesn’t help.”

She laughs. “You asked.”

****

X + X + X + X + X

He sticks close to Sandy when Mike and Misha go off in one direction and Chad and Tom take another. Jensen had already said hi and given him a quick kiss, but he said he had to take care of some house stuff and they should mingle as they could before he came back. It goes on longer than they’d imagined, but Jared and Sandy keep each other company, much like the party a few weeks ago. They drink and huddle in a corner, sharing conversation whenever any of their friends float by. 

Jared leaves Sandy to Mike’s attention and coasts through the house, even grabbing onto Steve to ask about Jensen, but he doesn’t know. After a thorough basement and main floor search, he goes upstairs and finds Jensen in his room, fussing through a dresser. Jared slips behind, arms circling his waist as he kisses the back of his head. 

Jensen stiffens for a second then says, “That better not be Rosey.”

He laughs and sucks at the side of Jensen’s neck. “I sure hope you’re not expecting him.” Turning his head, Jensen moves into a quick kiss before Jared releases him back to the dresser. Jared leans against the desk just next to it. “What’re you up to?”

“Trying to find my key so I can lock the room.”

“Does that mean we can’t use it?” Jensen turns to him and looks lost for a second or two before his eyes clear up. Jared asks, “You okay?”

He waves Jared off. “Yeah, no. I just … think I’m tired. It’s been a long week.”

“What’s up?” Jared asks with care but can’t manage to move closer because he’s starting to worry that his little fear of being too much too soon is a reality here. 

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

Jared watches as Jensen goes through his dresser drawers, sweeping clothes this way and that, but coming up empty. He swallows hard and stares at the top of the desk when he asks, “Is it all too much?”

“Is what too much?” Jensen asks, distracted and still searching.

“This? Us?”

Jensen looks up and Jared can’t read what he’s thinking or what’s showing on his face, but it looks mostly unsure. “What’re you talking about?”

He clears his throat and spills it all without looking at Jensen, mostly just staring out the bedroom window onto the neighborhood below. “You joke that I’m too attached and co-dependent. Is it really too much? I can back off if you just say so. If I bug you too much and touch too much, just tell me.”

His face turns down for a long moment but then he has a slow, lazy smile. “Jesus, no. You’re just fine.” Jared turns to him and finally smiles when Jensen grabs at the edge of Jared’s shirt. “That’s not what’s wrong.”

“Then what is?”

Jensen frowns and looks out that same window. He takes a noisy, deep breath and exhales just as loud. “It’s no offense at all, I swear. But whenever I see Sandy, I think about that night you came out of the bathroom.”

Jared watches Jensen for a few seconds before it clicks and he frowns. 

“I understand … what you said about it. About that arrangement. But it still kinda stings, ya know?”

His frown deepens and he looks away, freaking out a little that Jensen can’t look at one of his closest friends without recalling a bad night. He’s not sure what to say, so the first thing in his head comes out. “You wanna get outta here?”

“Yeah?”

He moves close, arms around Jensen’s waist, and he kisses his shoulder when he feels Jensen hug him back. Jared says against Jensen’s neck, “We can go back to my room. I bet Chad’ll be here all night.”

Even while Jensen holds him tighter and mouths along his throat, he says, “Didn’t you bring Sandy?”

Jared tries to quiet his sigh and just gives a tiny smile. “I’ll make sure one of the guys help her home.”

****

X + X + X + X + X

They’re holding hands as they walk through campus, keeping to the best-lit walking paths. Jared threads their fingers together and squeezes. “So, you have to promise that when there’s something wrong, you tell me.”

Jensen laughs. “Trust me, I will have no problem telling you when you’re doing something wrong.’

He chuckles. “Not what I meant, but I guess I’ll take it.”

“So, what’re the plans? Watch some Lawrence Welk and drink soda pop? I know how you like to follow Chad’s rules.”

Jared laughs and brings Jensen closer. “Fuck Chad.”

“No, you’re not fucking Chad.”

He smirks. “Gosh, I never knew you were such a jealous little gay.”

Jensen rolls his eyes but still smiles. “You’re not allowed sex in the room, but what about blow jobs?”

“He never did answer that one, but I think we should just see what we can get done before he comes home.”

One eyebrow goes up and then Jensen chuckles and shakes his head. “You really like playing with fire. I’m not so sure I wanna test Chad’s will.”

“Seriously? Fuck Chad. He’s just jealous that I’m getting head and he’s not.”

Jensen looks at his watch. “He’s probably eight beers in. He just might be getting some now.”

“Unless there are girls at least ten beers in, he is so not getting blown.”

“And this is your friend,” Jensen points out.

“I know,” he nods. “And I know this well enough to know that he’s not getting any until the girls are trashed.”

“How much did you drink tonight?”

“You mean while you ditched me? Just a few.” Jensen chuckles and squeezes his hand and Jared goes on. “Enough to not have faith in Chad’s skills. Maybe another eleven and I’d be his wingman.”

“How does that work? You know, you liking dick and all.”

He frowns. “Not very well. I have a conscience and don’t wanna lead girls on. But it never stops Chad from asking.”

“And again, I can’t believe you choose to live with him.”

Jared chuckles. “It’s actually the easiest thing I’ve ever done. I mean, yeah, I get called homo and buttpirate on a regular basis, but the guy makes me laugh, too. And he’s clean and doesn’t smell. That is a huge upgrade from last year.”

Jensen pushes Jared up the stairs to his building. “I’m not sure how to feel with you defending him this much.”

Once they’re in the elevator, Jared pushes Jensen into the wall. “How do you feel about this?”

His hands slip into Jared’s back pockets and tug him even closer. “Not bad, but it’ll be good in a few,” he smirks.

Jensen kisses him hard, tongue thick in Jared’s mouth and pushing around. Jared fights back with his mouth, sucking on Jensen’s tongue and biting into his lips until the elevator dings and they stumble together with Jared’s arms wound around Jensen’s shoulders, pulling him back tightly. When they get to his room, Jared pushes Jensen against the door and sucks along his neck while he tries to dig the keys out and work the lock without moving away. It doesn’t work, and Jensen’s laughing at him. “Shut up, asshole,” Jared grumbles as he moves back enough to see what he’s doing. 

They all but fall onto his thin bed, grabbing at clothes, pulling shirts off in an instant. Jared powers Jensen to his back and starts to work Jensen’s fly, but he’s pausing every few moments, not believing he can have this right now. It’s been just over a month, really, but it’s all he’s thought of for so many weeks and weeks before this. He pulls Jensen’s pants and boxers down then rubs up and around the thighs. Jensen stretches, arms above his head and he smirks as he watches Jared move in to lick along up his chest, kissing and mouthing across the bare skin without any plan for attack but to just taste Jensen. Jensen starts to sit up and reaches for Jared’s waistband. “Get outta these?” 

Jared shuffles forward, kneels before Jensen, and lets him work his fly, pull his pants and boxers down. It’s an awkward angle, but soon enough, Jensen’s head tilts up and he’s sucking Jared down, using so much tongue, driving him crazy. Jared’s hand supports Jensen’s neck and he tries so hard to not push into his mouth, but it all feels too good to not move with him. 

“Jensen,” Jared says gently, nudging him away, but he’s smiling. “Too much of that and we’d be done too soon.”

He slides up from underneath and helps Jared out of his pants, yanking the clothing down with his feet while his hands roam all over Jared’s body, not stopping anywhere for too long. Then he pulls Jared down to his lap and they’re grinding together, skin on skin like never before. Their kisses are proof of the surge they get from the feeling because their mouths are frantic and messy and noisy. 

Jared suddenly whimpers when Jensen’s finger swirls around the edge of his hole. He breaks the kiss, pushing his forehead against Jensen’s. “Let me, please?” he pleads like he’s losing his mind. “I wanna do it. Wanna fuck you.”

Jensen chuckles, slowly pushing his finger in. “There’ll be time for that, too.”

He whimpers again, but then starts rocking onto Jensen’s finger. “Don’t know how long I’ve thought about it. Being inside you.”

“Think I can imagine,” Jensen says against Jared’s cheek. “Lube?”

“Fuck,” he whines and drops his head to Jensen’s shoulder. “You’re really gonna do this?” 

“You really crying about this?”

“I just … I wanted to,” he mumbles.

Jensen’s hands roam Jared’s back and he mouths along the collarbone. “Jare, come on.”

“I don’t want to stop to look.”

He chuckles and releases Jared with a tiny smile. “Go look before I hurt you.”

He nods with a smile of his own, knowing that Jensen isn’t exactly long, but the girth is unimaginable. It really is going to hurt, but Jared’s just glad they’re finally _here_. Jared finds the lube and a condom in his dresser. Jensen works the condom on himself then Jared drizzles lube over Jensen’s fingers and puts some into his own hand. As he gets back into Jensen’s space, he starts stroking Jensen, which makes Jensen hum and close his eyes and blindly fumble his fingers around Jared’s ass. Jensen slides another in, working the hole open with distinct pressure while Jared keeps stroking Jensen’s dick.

It’s not much longer until Jensen grabs Jared’s hand to stop him. “You keep going and we’re done.”

Jared laughs and kisses Jensen, slowing only when there’s a third finger inside and he whimpers. His hand turns into Jensen’s, fingers curling over each other and holding tight. 

“You okay?” Jensen asks quietly. 

He nods against Jensen’s head and closes his eyes, concentrates on the burn subsiding until it feels good. 

“Jared,” he says with wonder and maybe a little bit of worry. “You’ve done this before, right?”

His eyes are closed tight as he stutters back on Jensen’s hand. “I just … just one time. In high school. I …” 

Jensen’s hand stills and the other moves to hold Jared’s head. “Jared?”

“Are you gonna stop?” Jared asks weakly. He knows Jensen can read the hesitation and truth in his eyes. When Jensen’s fingers slip out, he groans. “Come on.”

The hand stays at Jared’s ass, just touching gently as his voice is also soft. “What happened in high school?”

He takes a deep breath, figuring there’s no way to get around this, and he doesn’t want to lie about it. Jared pushes his face into Jensen’s neck so he doesn’t have to look at him when he lamely admits, “He just stuck it in. We didn’t do much.” Jensen strokes along the back of Jared’s neck. “I’ve done it. Just never … not to me.”

Jensen’s breath is loud in the quiet room but then he chuckles. He, too, sounds a bit pathetic when he says, “You don’t know how much I want to do this. But I don’t want to hurt you.”

“How do you think I feel?”

He chuckles again but pulls away to look at Jared. “Think we should wait.”

“No, no, no,” he rambles on, holding Jensen’s face. “I want to do this with you. God, I want you to. Just … we can be slow, right? And careful? Right?”

“Jared, you’re nervous. You’re tense and nervous. Only gonna make it worse.”

He’s disappointed for sure, but there’s a small part of him that warms at Jensen dealing with him like this, with Jensen being so gentle about the situation. He kisses him softly then nearly whispers against Jensen’s mouth, “Just try it? And we can stop whenever you say. I want to. I want this.”

Jensen’s eyes glaze over with the last words and he kisses Jared, languid and easy while squeezing at his ass. His finger creeps up to the hole but he warns, “You have to tell me when to stop. You have to.”

Jared nods against him and hums when he has two fingers again, working and pushing in, up, around, stretching him. A third is painful again, but it subsides as they kiss and Jared focuses his energy and all feeling on Jensen’s mouth. 

It works until Jensen pushes the fingers in deep and hard. “You ready?”

He takes a deep, loud breath and waits a few seconds. He nods, temple to Jensen’s, breathing heavy while Jensen withdraws his hand then guides Jared down. The press of Jensen’s dick into his hole is exactly what he thought it would be, blunt and thick. It’s a long, torturous slide until Jared is right down into Jensen’s lap and they’re both breathing rough. 

Jensen’s head falls to Jared’s chest as he steadies his breathing and feels Jared’s heart through his chest, beating rapidly and thumping right against his forehead. “You have to tell me when to move.”

Jared shifts a little, feeling the solid mass burn again and he stops, waits for the hard stretch to not feel so hard anymore. “God, how big are you?” Jared whimpers. “This never hurts when I blow you.”

He laughs, feeling tension ease out of them both. “It is a fact that your mouth is bigger than your ass.”

“Fuck,” Jared sighs as he shifts again, but it doesn’t feel as bad. He rises a little, going up on his knees and feels Jensen’s dick slide out but then he moves back down, filling himself again. 

“Oh, God,” Jensen whines. “You feel … you are,” he bites out as Jared does it again. Then again and they start up a rhythm as Jensen’s hands hold his hips and direct Jared right back to him every time. 

There are small words shared, about how great it feels, and how hot it is, how much they love this. Jared still whimpers at certain movements, like he can’t decide if it actually hurts or if it’s a good kind of pain. Then Jensen pushes Jared’s hips faster because it’s so tight that he can’t last very long and decides to just put Jared out of his misery. One hand guides Jared while the other strokes him, which makes Jared whimper more, but in wonder. “I’m gonna … So close.” 

Jensen kisses him, tongue thick in Jared’s mouth. He says against Jared, “Just do it, let it go.”

And he does. He lets his mouth go, muttering _Oh, God … fuck … you, oh_ and other nonsense as he lets Jensen jerk him off until he shoots across their chests and stutters against Jensen’s body. Jensen holds him close and mouths along Jared’s collarbone as he pushes up and through the pulsing of Jared’s hole and then he comes, moaning against Jared’s skin before his body eases up and their muscles all but liquefy. Jared shifts up and off of Jensen, grabbing tissues to wipe down then he sits back while Jensen takes care of the condom and cleans himself. 

The eyes look lazy and Jensen’s mouth is even more so when he motions a hand and says, “C’mere.”

Jared settles mostly on top of Jensen given how thin the bed is. He barely manages to sleep there on a regular basis, but adding Jensen makes it difficult. Though he is worn out enough to feel exhaustion easily drift over him. He shifts to bring the blankets up then moves back into Jensen’s space with arms tangled around each other. “Might’ve been easier in a bigger bed,” Jared mumbles.

Jensen laughs, pushing a hand through Jared’s hair. He rests his mouth at his hair and opens it to speak. But he just kisses Jared’s forehead and squeezes him in closer.


	4. Chapter 4

“You fucking buttfucks,” Chad drunkenly yells the second he’s in the room. 

They wake, shifting to look at the light from the hallway and Chad charging into the room to leap at them on the bed. “Oh, fuck!” Jared yells when he gets a knee to his back. Jensen shuffles off the bed and yanks the blanket from Chad’s bed around him. 

Chad keeps fighting against Jared, crawling onto his back and scrubbing hands through his hair in the world’s worst noogie. “I told you, homo. No gay sex in the room.”

Jensen moves to the doorway where Mike and Misha are laughing maniacally at the whole thing. “Thanks, guys,” he says with a crabby smile. “You were supposed to keep him with you.”

“What?” Mike shrugs and smirks. “Chad missed Jared and was worried about him.”

“It smells like anal sex in here! Jesus Christ,” Chad whines, smacking Jared’s head. 

He finally laughs with the whole thing and kicks and pushes Chad right to the floor. He drags his blanket around him and kicks Chad once more. “You totally just jumped me in bed. I’m naked, assfuck.”

Chad stumbles to his feet and then onto his bed, grasping at the fitted sheet. He looks to the doorway, sees Jensen, and whines. “Aw, you fucker. That’s my blanket touching your gay penis.”

Jared leans forward, smacking his head. “Shut up, asshole.”

He scowls at Jared then looks to Jensen with an odd glance, almost sorry. His voice gets low. “I’m sorry. You can keep my gay blanket.”

Jared kicks at Chad’s knee. “Your blanket is not gay.”

“Is now.”

He looks to the doorway and scowls at Mike and Misha. “I hate you assholes.”

“Hey!” Mike quickly argues. “You forced him onto us for the last five hours.”

“You couldn’t handle him for a few more?”

Tom appears behind the group. “That asshole was calling every girl we saw ‘vagina.’ You think I wanted to spend any more time with him than was possible? Ruined any chance I had to get laid.” Then Tom looks to Jensen in a blanket and Jared much the same way. “Dude, you guys are sleeping together now?”

Mike pushes at his head. “You’re the dumbest shit I’ve ever known. Get out of here,” he adds, shoving then leading him down the hall. 

Misha motions to Chad. “Let’s go, homophobe. You can crash on my floor.”

Chad’s in the hallway, but he can still be heard whining, “I’m not a homophobe. I love my Big Gay Roommate.”

Jensen watches Misha lead Chad down to his room then he frowns at Jared. “I don’t think Chad was kidding about Rule One.”

On cue, Jared rubs his back where Chad’s knee had dug into his muscles and spine. “Yeah, I don’t think so.”

“You okay?” he asks as he sits next to Jared. 

“Yeah. Fucking sore.”

“You moved a lot faster than I thought you would … you know, considering …”

Jared tries to hide his laugh, but he fails and then just smiles as he elbows Jensen. “Shut the hell up.”

Chad stumbles back into the room with arms swung out wide. “You’re not sexing again are you? I just have to change.” He sways in front of his dresser and fumbles with pulling his clothes off while Jared and Jensen watch with barely hidden horror. 

“You wanna go back to my place?” Jensen asks.

Jared thinks about it and between the pain in his back and the dull ache further down, he winces. “I don’t know if I can walk that far.”

Chad drops onto his bed, luckily wearing sleep pants, and stares at them. “J, you let him poke you in the ass?” he asks, sounding quite coherent considering the last ten minutes of drunken fighting. 

Jared shakes his head and sighs as he stands and nudges Jensen. “Alright, let’s go.”

****

X + X + X + X + X

As finals week looms, Jensen bans Jared from his house during the week but Jared refuses to not see Jensen … so they meet up at the library every night to study together. Yet most of the time, Jared just wraps his feet around Jensen’s ankles and distracts him by talking about every little thing he can come up with that doesn’t have anything to do with his textbooks.

“Jared,” Jensen says with strength in his voice.

“What?” Jared asks a bit too innocently.

Jensen just motions to his books and notes where he’s scribbled all the important bits of information he needs to know by heart next week.

Jared tips his head to the side, ignoring the fact that Jensen goes back to reading and taking notes. “What’re you doing for break?”

“Going home,” he says absently while his hand runs loops over the paper.

“Yeah, but what’re you doing at home?”

“Anything that doesn’t have to do with school.”

“Like?”

Jensen’s head remains down and he flips pages over until he reads a few lines and scribbles more bits of information down. “Like thinking that I just might’ve passed my finals.”

Jared’s feet tuck tighter around Jensen’s ankles. “Any chance you can fit in thoughts of your boyfriend?”

“If I survive next week, it’s possible.”

“Jensen,” Jared says with more push in his voice.

He finally stops and looks up. “What?” he sighs. 

Jared’s surprised by Jensen’s tired look and voice. He looks down at his biology book and moves his hand like he’ll write words into the margins but he doesn’t. He just stares down at the figure on the page he’s stuck at. “I dunno … it’ll be a month.”

“Yeah.”

His mouth works and then twists before he says, “A long month.”

Jensen takes a breath and twists his foot between Jared’s. “Yeah, I know.”

Jared shrugs a little but still won’t look Jensen in the face. He brushes a thumb over his eyebrow. “Maybe we could meet up or something?”

He stares for a few moments then he tips his head to the side with light eyes. “Jared, yeah. I’m not gonna just ignore you for four weeks.”

The smile is tiny as Jared tries to hide it. “No, I know,” he says quickly, like he’s trying to squash his tiny bit of panic over not seeing Jensen for a whole month. “I just … maybe we could make plans, or something?” He looks up, nervous and hesitant. “I dunno. Am I being a chick about this?”

Jensen smirks and goes back to his notes. “You are most definitely being a chick about this.”

Jared chuckles, more uncomfortably than amused because like so many times before, he’s feeling like he’s chasing Jensen. The guy jokes about Jared being too attached, being co-dependent, and he feels it even more right here without Jensen even saying the words. It stews in his head and he sits on those thoughts for the rest of their time in the library. He focuses more on his studying, at least with his eyes because he doesn’t look at Jensen much until they’re ready to leave. Jared shuffles a few steps behind Jensen as they head out of the building and through the quad. 

“Jesus, I’m wiped,” Jensen sighs, swallowing down a yawn. His mouth is crooked and eyes flat, like he can’t manage to hold himself together. They really have spent every night at the library to study.

Jared quickly swipes a hand over Jensen’s back and says, “I’ll see ya in class tomorrow.”

Jensen stops and watches Jared start to turn. He grabs onto his elbow. “Hey, you’re not coming over?”

He shrugs. “You look like you could use the sleep.”

“Well, yeah, but you can still come by.”

“Really?”

Jensen snorts, tugging Jared closer. “Of course. Since when do I turn you away?”

“Christmas?” he asks with a playful smile.

“Jared, serious. We’ll see each other.”

“Yeah, I know,” he says, but his voice is uneasy. “I just … this week and finals and you. It’s just … I dunno.”

Jensen waits for Jared to clarify that, to explain the self-doubt. But it doesn’t come and Jensen’s eyes droop and he looks like he’s now just a few minutes away from passing out. “I’m gonna crash the second I get in, but I wouldn’t mind you being my pillow.”

Jared remembers the few other times when Jensen was drained beyond comprehension and how he tended to let random comments leak out. This moment eases him a bit and he jokes, “Well, I can’t turn that down.”

“C’mon then,” Jensen says tiredly as he drags Jared along with him. 

When they drop into bed, Jensen truly using Jared as a body pillow, Jared swipes his hand down Jensen’s back. His voice is quiet when he chances to ask, “Maybe we can plan to meet up halfway. On weekends or something?”

“Hmm?”

“Over break. I just … you think I’m being a baby. I just … I like to know. Like to have it out there that there’s an actual plan to follow.”

Jensen takes a loud breath and shifts against Jared but doesn’t look at him. “Stop worrying,” he says in a flat tone. 

“I’m not,” Jared argues back, even when he is worrying. 

“I’mma wake up one mornin’ with you on my front step, aren’t I?”

Jared tenses and goes quiet. He’s been so consumed with wanting to see Jensen over break that he’d been avoiding the thought of them actually visiting either home. It’s equal parts worry that Jensen’s family might not like him, that Jensen wouldn’t want it to happen because it signals this as way too serious for only being together two months, and mostly, Jensen has never mentioned it, so Jared had thrown that idea out. 

Before Jared can answer, he feels the steady rise and fall of Jensen’s chest, signaling that he’s sleeping and no longer a part of the conversation. 

****

X + X + X + X + X

After their Calc final, Jared finds Mike outside the building, seated on a decorative brick half wall and playing with his cell. Once Jared nears, he snaps it shut and goads, “Doomed to fail?”

“Fuck no,” Jared laughs. “Aced it.”

“Really?”

“Okay, maybe not ace,” he relents. “But I feel good about it.”

“You two spent enough time studying for it.”

Jared drops down next to Mike. “Fucker banned me from the house, so I could only see him at the library.”

Mike laughs. “Yeah, sounds like Jenny’s little finals freak out.”

“Freak out?”

“He gets tense about tests, especially the big ones.” Mike goes back to his cell, tapping out a text message. “Surprised he even let you study with him.”

Jared kicks his feet out and back into the wall. “Well, he ignored me half the time, and the other half he mocked me for asking about break.”

“What _are_ you doing for break?”

“Going home? Not seeing him?” he shrugs with minimal pouting. 

Mike laughs as he stands and slaps Jared’s back. “Like he would stay away?”

Jared’s about to ask about that but Jensen joins them with a tense smile. “I fucking hate calc.”

Mike points out, “I do believe yesterday it was ‘I fucking hate stats.’”

“Yeah, I hate that, too,” Jensen grumbles as they fall in line to leave. “How’d you do?” he asks Jared.

Jared answers, “Fine, I guess,” as Mike goads, “Fucker says he aced.”

Jensen grumbles and shakes his head. “And you hardly even studied, just distracted me the whole time.”

“What? I studied,” he argues back, not really sure why, but he suddenly feels defensive. “And I didn’t ace,” he grits out at Mike. “I said I felt fine about it.”

Mike laughs at them both. “You girls two seconds from a catfight?” They both shoot him annoyed looks and Jared rolls his eyes. “When you headin’ out?” he asks Jensen.

Jensen adjusts his backpack as he answers, “Few hours? Don’t really wanna hang around and remember how awful this week was.”

Jared tenses but doesn’t say anything, not really sure what the right response is. 

“You’re such a bitchy little whiner,” Mike says. “You moan about every test ever.”

“I take my shit seriously, alright?” Jensen shoots back and Jared just grabs tighter to the strap on his shoulder bag. “I can’t help it that Jared’s got, like, a fucking photographic memory, and you stash answers on your calculator.”

Jared can tell that Jensen’s getting tenser as Mike tries to playfully argue, but he doesn’t want to say anything about it, worried that Jensen will get more upset. Instead, he excuses himself and Mike just waves him off. 

But Jensen stops and tugs at the hem of Jared’s shirt. “Hey, c’mere,” he says without the usual little smirk, but there is strength in the words. He pulls Jared into a hug, one arm around the back of his neck and tucking him in tight. Jensen kisses the side of his neck and talks at the skin. “I’ll call in a few days.”

He takes a breath, squeezes back and nods. “Yeah, don’t worry,” he tries to say smoothly. 

Jensen pulls on Jared’s neck, bringing him in to kiss. It’s short and gentle, but it’s still a nice gesture, especially in the middle of campus and in the open. Jensen’s mouth twitches between being level and trying to not smile. Jared’s does the same, but he can feel it tip more towards a frown. He wants to say more in this goodbye, but Mike’s there and Jensen’s moving away. “Don’t pine too much. Stay away from the Dashboard Confessional, and don’t cut yourself.”

“Fuck off,” he says with a small smile and a roll of his eyes. He waves his hand in the air with the middle finger out and he turns away to head back to the dorm.

****

X + X + X + X + X

Jared’s dad and Chad haul another round of luggage and boxes down to the family van while Jared and his mom tidy up the few things he’s leaving behind that aren’t needed over break. 

“Survived another semester,” his mom says with a smile.

He flips his eyebrows up but won’t do much more. He is not in any way looking forward to going home. Usually he can’t wait to get back to his parents’ house to visit and see the family, hang out with Megan and just relax without having homework or tests or early mornings. But this semester has been such a big deal to him – meeting Mike and the guys and _Jensen_, living with Chad, _being_ with Jensen – he wishes it didn’t have to stop being that way. 

“You okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired,” he says carefully. “Been a long week.” And he so feels it. Tension with Jensen and trying to avoid repeats of the ‘what’re we gonna do over break’ conversation have grated more on his nerves than any of his finals. 

“You sure your classes were okay?” She turns from the desk she’d been wiping down and gives him a comforting glance. “Not worried about any of them? I’d rather we know now than when the grades come in.”

“No, no,” he shakes his head confidently. “Grades should be fine.” He’s confident in that. “Just tired,” he shrugs. 

“I think he’s sad he won’t see me for a month,” Chad says when he and Jared’s dad return to the room.

“Yes, exactly that,” Jared nods with a terse smile. “Don’t know how I’ll survive without you.”

Chad swipes over Jared’s head, and it’s obvious he’s being careful with his words in front of the parents. His voice is surprisingly easy and encouraging. “You’ll be fine. We can have a little sweetheart’s weekend while you’re home.”

“Shut up,” he laughs, pushing Chad away. 

“When are you heading home?” Jared’s mom asks. 

“Have one more final mañana then I’m out,” he says, rubbing his hands together. “Room all to myself tonight.” Jared tips his head with a skeptical face but Chad just smiles. “Think I’ll eat chili fries in your bed and use the rest of your fruity little shampoo.”

The parents chuckle, and Jared’s laughing fairly easily until there’s a knock at the door and Jensen’s in the doorway. 

“Gay Fantastic,” Chad snorts before he can realize it. 

Jared gives Chad a sharp look before checking with his parents to see their reaction, but they’re just watching him. They know he’s gay, but he hadn’t exactly talked much about Jensen. He really hasn’t talked to them much at all since Jensen came along. Partly because he didn’t want to jinx it, and also because he was always _with_ Jensen. Not much time to be on the phone to talk about it. “Hey,” Jared says as easily as possible while tightly holding a couple tees in his hand. Just a quick turn to his right and he could put them into his last duffle bag, but he just holds them and stares at Jensen. 

Jensen absently taps fingers on the doorframe. “Just making rounds, saying bye.” His eyes coast over to Jared’s parents and it’s obvious that he’s uncomfortable. His voice goes light and he looks down the hallway. “You guys seen Mike or Tom? Thought I’d check in before I head out.”

“No, I haven’t,” Jared says while glancing at Chad.

Chad rolls his eyes.”You are hopeless.”

“JT?” his mom asks carefully.

Jared snaps out of the stare he has on Jensen and smiles awkwardly at his mom. “Yeah, Mom, Dad, this is Jensen. Friends with some guys down the hall.” He squirms a bit when he sees Jensen tense while trying to smile and shakes their hands. Jared doesn’t exactly want to say ‘this is the guy I’ve been sleeping with,’ and worse yet, he doesn’t know what Jensen would want him to say. 

Chad, on the other hand, can’t handle the tension and takes over. He looks at Jared’s parents. “Think we can handle these?” he asks while pointing at a few of the last items to go.

His mom seems awkward but Chad not-too-subtly raises an eyebrow and nods toward Jensen. They seem to get it because Jared and Jensen are left alone in seconds. 

“Thought you were heading out earlier?” Jared asks as easily as possible.

Jensen laughs awkwardly, scrubs fingers into the back of his head. “Yeah, I was.” He takes a moment then asks carefully, “Do your parents not know?”

He shrugs and feels guilty in a second. “I’ve barely talked to them this whole semester. Didn’t know where to fit in ‘by the way, I’ve been spending all my free time being co-dependently attached to this guy’.”

There’s a snort then Jensen rests a hand at Chad’s dresser and works his mouth a bit before he says, “You know … I seriously hate finals week.”

Jared chuckles uncomfortably. “Don’t think anyone loves it.”

He shrugs and takes a deep breath. “I was 20 minutes out and so glad it was over. I freaking stress so much on these things, you have no idea.”

“Think I’m starting to get the idea.”

Jensen goes on like Jared hasn’t said anything. “And then this, and I was just fucked over every day. I was 20 minutes out and I turned around to say bye to you.”

Jared blinks and thinks _already said bye, after the final_. He lamely says, “Thought you were looking for Mike ‘n Tom?”

His head tips to the side and he’s giving the most critical look Jared’s ever seen. “I’m standing here, aren’t I?”

All of Jensen’s words stream through his mind again and he’s stuck on _20 minutes out and I turned around_. His smile is small, but he can feel it warming his face with his revelation. “You’re gonna miss me.” Jensen’s eyebrows flick up in response, and Jared’s smile gets bigger. “You’re honest-to-goodness gonna miss me, and you had to come back to say bye _again_.”

Jensen rolls his eyes but says, “What of it?”

“Thought I was the one obsessed?”

“You kinda are,” Jensen points out. “Asking me daily what we were gonna do over break.”

Jared’s confidence deflates a bit, but he’s still fired up with Jensen being here, in his room, right now. “I was curious.”

“Obsessed.”

He snaps back to the point in front of him, the point of Jensen’s presence. His voice comes out a bit arrogant. “Hey! This whole thing right now is because you’re here and so attached to me that you had to run right back and say bye. _Again_.”

Jensen tips his head to the side and sighs, but he’s smiling. “Okay, yeah. That is my point in being here. You gonna ruin it by being smug?”

“No, of course not,” Jared chuckles as he moves close, hands on hips and mouth immediately on Jensen’s. Their arms wind around each other as Jared pulls Jensen in tight. Once he needs air, he rests his forehead against Jensen’s. “That better?”

“Yeah, a little.” Jensen kisses him again. “I have no idea on plans, but I’ll find a way to escape this weekend.”

Jared smiles. “You’re so cute. You can’t even be away for three days.”

His eyebrow goes high. “You’re the one who never tried a day without me.”

“Yeah, but it’s kinda nice to see it the other way around.”

“Okay, so I have feelings,” he says on a tired sigh, but Jared can see where Jensen’s starting to smile.

“You’re in _looooove_.”

Jensen rolls his eyes and grumbles, “Shut up.”

“You’re in love with _meeeee_,” Jared smirks against Jensen’s lips. 

They work small, slow kisses, and Jensen sounds a little dazed. “I was slow, but I caught up.”

Jared holds Jensen’s face and says against Jensen’s mouth, “You’re totally in love with me and you’re gonna miss me.”

Jensen chuckles and pulls back. “Think maybe you could say something else?”

“No,” he says, shaking his head and beaming. “This is the best revelation I’ve ever had.”

“Hey, gaybags, beware the parents,” Chad warns as he slips around them and to his bed. 

“JT, baby, you ready?” his mom asks.

Jared moves back but his hand is firm in Jensen’s with fingers twined when his mom smiles from the doorway. “Hey, Mama,” he says sweetly. “Think it’s time you met Jensen.” 

She looks confused as he says, “Well, yeah, before – ”

“Jensen’s my boyfriend.”

His parents look surprised, and so does Jensen, but Jared just smiles. Jared’s mom glances at her husband for a second and they look awkward, but not uneasy. “Didn’t know you were seeing anyone.”

Jared clears his throat. “A little too busy seeing him to tell anyone.”

“Right,” Chad snorts. 

Jared wants to smack Chad but he’s kind of grateful for the break in tension because she seems to accept that and smiles as she moves back in with a hand out to shake. “Jensen, it’s really nice to meet you.”

Jensen’s smile is small but Jared can tell it’s real, like he’s nervous but excited right here. “You, too, ma’am. Sir,” he nods at Jared’s father.

“Sherry,” she admonishes. “And Gerry.”

He nods and Jared squeezes his hand again.

“What’re your plans for break?” Sherry asks him.

Jensen looks at Jared. “Going home.”

“Well, when you get the chance to get near, you need to come for dinner.” Jensen nearly laughs at how insistent she is. “No ifs, ands, or buts.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he nods and then corrects, “Sherry. Thank you. That’d be nice.”

She winks then pats Jared on the cheek. “We’ll be downstairs.”

Once they’re gone, Jared’s grinning. “You have to come now. No one says no to Mama Padalecki.”

Jensen watches him for a second then asks cynically, “You call her mama?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“Is your entire family co-dependent?”

Chad buts in, “Where do you think he gets it from?”

“Shut up, dick,” Jared says as he swings at Chad’s head. 

“You homos gonna leave any time soon? I’d like to watch my porn in private.”

"Since when?” Jensen asks, laughing.

“Fuck you with a dick.”

“I already do,” Jared says, smacking Chad’s head.

Chad’s voice goes loud and high. “I hate you so fucking much.”

“You’re imagining it, aren’t you?”

“Get out of here,” Chad grumbles, trying his best to ignore them.

Jared pushes a bag at Jensen. “You gonna help or just stand there lookin’ pretty?”

Jensen’s grumbling as he heaves the duffel over his shoulder but then he’s in close and kissing Jared, holding firm at his waist. 

As they head out the door, Jared smiles and slips his hand into Jensen’s. “You’re totally gonna be miserable without me.”

“Pretty much,” Jensen replies. 

“I knew it.”


	5. Timestamp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timestamp: set a few months after end of first story; second semester of the same school year

Chad had barked a laugh and told Jared he wouldn’t believe it without seeing it. So, before his Bio class, Jared marches his way out to the quad and watches as Mike Rosenbaum stands silently among all the regular preachers, activists, and anti-abortion groups spouting on and on about how everyone’s going to hell for everything they do wrong. It isn’t so much the juxtaposition of Mike – the goofy, bald guy who lives down the hall and is responsible for the most creative floor outings (imagine 20 coeds flooding the local arcade) and pranks – with all these homophobes, racists, politicos, and other raving lunatics. It's really because he stands there holding a poster with Misha’s face on it, high above his head like he's auditioning for _Say Anything_.

And yet, it’s even more disturbing as Jared realizes the poster is really a giant recreation of the night they all got high and convinced Misha the best way to combat adult acne was a yogurt mask, and the guy poured a whole tub of it over his face. Jared smirks at the memory, but feels something stir in his belly for unease, because it’s still an odd public display.

He stands for a bit, crossing his arms, and waiting for the second act of the prank. But a few minutes turn into a lot and he finally settles at the cement stairs that flank one end of the quad. He leans back, pushing his backpack behind him to serve as a pillow, and just watches. He becomes more amused with other students chuckling as they spot Mike, but nothing else really happens. 

The steps are loud, but he doesn’t bother looking up until there’s a fine smack at the back of his head. “Ahh, fuck!” he complains as he jerks around. But then he’s just giving a sour smile while rubbing the back of his head because Jensen sits down next to him. “Shithead.”

“Aww, honey, you’re so sweet,” Jensen deadpans as he leans in close to kiss hello. He looks out to the center of the quad and chuckles as he sits back, elbows on the step behind him. “He still out here?”

Jared sits back the same way and they both keep their eyes on Mike. “Yeah.”

“How long you been here?”

His mouth quirks. “Long enough.”

“That’s specific.”

“Missed Bio.”

Jensen tsks. “You’re gonna fail that class.”

“Nah, I’ll get Jeff to help when I go home.” He can see that Jensen turns at that, staring carefully without saying anything. Jared whines a little. “C’mon, man. We talked about this.”

Turning back to Mike and shrugging, Jensen goes for nonchalance. “What?” he says a little defensively. “I was just lookin’ at you.”

“It’s just a week,” Jared insists as he bumps his shoulder to Jensen’s. “It’s not like I’m goin’ home permanently.”

“Whatever, it’s fine,” Jensen says with an easier tone, like it really is. But they’d gotten into it after a bit too much Jack Daniels and Jensen admitted he wasn’t looking forward to Spring Break when Jared was going home and he was staying in town to work. It got brought up a few more times, thankfully while sober, but it still was a touchy subject. To distract himself and Jared from another discussion, Jensen bumps their knees together. “Misha been here yet?”

“Haven’t seen him.” His head tips towards Jensen but the eyes stay on Mike. And that dumb poster. “He know Mike’s here?”

“Doubt it. He’d likely be out here with his own incriminating photos.”

Jared nods, thinking about Mike’s stunt. “I thought they’d settled the prank war?”

“So did he.” Jensen nods while he leans a little closer to Jared, enough to feel the heat of their arms pressed together, and also to share the story quietly. “Turns out Misha’s a master at the art of porny sketching and Mike’s wipeboard now proudly presents Tom fucking him over a desk.” Jared hitches his laughter, trying to not be too loud with other students seated around them and also passing through. Jensen nods again. “In permanent marker.”

“God, I don’t know which of them is worse.”

“Oh, shit,” Jensen murmurs as he sits up with interest.

Jared follows, too, and they see Misha walking up to Mike, looking at the board, all cool and collected. Then the guy reaches for the board, and they fight over it for a few seconds before Mike lets go and Misha stares at it. Then he smacks it right over Mike’s head and it splits like a karate board. Jared and Jensen break in laughter at the way Misha looks at the pieces in his hands like he doesn’t know what they really are.

“Oh, Jesus,” Jensen again murmurs when Mike suddenly presents a _second_ board. This time, Misha’s wearing a crown and scarf, lipstick, and not much else. 

“Fuck,” Jared whispers. “I’ve never seen that one before.”

Jensen hums for a moment, like he doesn’t want to give away what’s running through his mind. But he relents when Jared pushes on his shoulder for attention. “I do believe that was in Mike’s private collection.”

Long, quiet moments tick by as Jared flips his eyes between Mike and Misha fighting over the second board and Jensen. “Wait, they … Misha did … Wait,” he says excitedly. “Mike and Misha?”

“Uh, yeah? You didn’t know?”

“_No_. I thought he and Tom …”

Jensen sighs a bit, because while he loves insider talk about his friends, he hates when others gossip about them. “Yeah, everyone does.”

“If they’re not, then why the drawing?”

“Because even _Misha_ thought they were.”

Jared leans back to rest at the stair behind him and lets out a low sigh. “Wow.”

Jensen does the same and pushes his shoulder into Jared again. “Yeah.”

With a bump of his shoulder, Jared tips his head closer. “Hey, Spring Break?” He sees Jensen stiffen without looking over, so he taps his forehead to Jensen’s temple quickly. “I’m not gonna be gone all week, ya know?”

His lips curl inside as Jensen bites on them then he lets them out with a small smack. “It’s fine.”

“Hey,” he grumbles, pushing into Jensen again, and the guy turns his head. “Not my fault my family actually wants to see me.”

Jensen rolls his eyes. “Ha, ha, real funny.”

Jared smirks then kisses Jensen. Soft mouth without tongue, but saying enough to ease them both together for the sweet gesture. “I’ll bring ya back some ham and ‘taters,” he says with an exaggerated accent. 

“Better get some dressin’,” Jensen drawls.

He bumps their shoulders again. “Sure thang.”

Jensen turns back to the quad and sits up a little. “Well, look at that,” he murmurs.

Misha’s hands are firmly tangled in Mike’s shirt as they’re obscenely kissing in front of everyone. Including the pastor with his grade school daughter – one that’s holding a sign that ironically reads _God is Love. Not Homosexuality._

Jared chuckles and admits quite ironically, “I love those fuckers.”


	6. Timestamp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timestamp: Set in the next school year, first semester (about one year after Jared and Jensen first met)

It’s been a damn long semester. Between Jared’s 17 hours of coursework and Jensen freaking out over 500-level Calc classes, life hasn’t been pleasant.

Jensen spends a good amount of his time in the library. Jared tries to join him, but it usually plays out the same way:

Jensen studies. 

Jared fidgets, hums, mumbles, tries to talk to Jensen.

Jensen huffs, sighs, rolls his eyes, huffs some more, maybe crabs.

Jared whines because they can’t have a decent conversation.

Jensen points out it’s a _library_ and ignores Jared.

*

Jared pops up at Jensen’s on occasion, but it never does them any good in terms of wanting to be alone. 

It turns out that Steve and Chris _really_ like Jared. They play Madden for hours on end and mostly laugh at Jensen’s expense until everyone’s tired enough to crash.

And even when Jared and Jensen have a few moments of peace, Chris or Steve find a way to spoil it. Starting a fight, inviting friends over to drink, trying to drag them into even more football games and interrupting any chance for a blow job that Jensen could ever have. It never works out well.

Jared keeps trying though.

*

They have the same friends, which really seemed to be a good thing. They wouldn’t have to get used to other people, and they could all hang in the same group. Unfortunately, this means that whenever Jensen is by Jared’s dorm room, Mike and Tom pop by to talk, recommend a new movie, or prod them into a quick game of basketball. 

Jared usually rolls his eyes, but Jensen goes with it. Mike and Tom have been his friends since his first day of college, longer than Jared’s known him. So there’s more history and thought there. They mean nearly as much to him as Jared does, and they both know it, so Jared has a hard time complaining.

*

They finally get a night alone in the dorm room and Jared’s got Jensen’s shirt off and working on his jeans. He’s laid out over him, so grateful for the quiet, for the darkness so they can just be together. They’re kissing maniacally because it really has been so long since they’ve been alone and not drained from classwork that they’re making up for the weeks of missed moments _right now_.

The tongues are sloppy and noisy as the hands are quick and fumbling. But they’re both excited, with loud voices and laughs as they’re antsy about it all. 

“Jared, c’mon, just get it … no, right … _yeah_.”

“Yeah, baby, come for me,” Jared nearly whines into Jensen’s mouth as he moves his hand up and down Jensen’s dick, tugging and twisting imperfectly but it’s all they have. “So hot and so hard, I can’t believe … how fuckin’ long, huh?”

“Too long. Way too long.”

“Kinda like you,” Jared smirks as he purposely tugs hard just once. 

Jensen laughs and then moans, enjoying the feeling of finally being touched by a hand not his own. But then he hears it: the jangle, the twist, and he groans, “Oh, fuck,” before he can help it.

Jared’s smiling against his neck, “Yeah, c’mon.”

He pushes Jared’s hand away, then physically shoves him away and tucks himself back in _just_ before the door opens and the room is illuminated.

There’s a second of silence then, “Oh, you’re faggin’ kidding me,” as Chad catches Jensen getting his pants back in order. 

Jared kicks at Chad’s knee as he passes through the room. “Thought you were out, asshole.”

Chad spins around and smacks at Jared’s head, instigating a quick round of wrestling as they grapple between the beds and then on the ground. Jensen sighs, stands, and steps right around them. He’s out the door before Jared can say a word. Though he does text _you coming back right?_

_goin’ home to finish myself off no thanks to your roommate_

In retaliation, Jared stashes Chad’s mattress in the showers.

*

They finally have a moment. It’s the little diner on the edge of campus that everyone goes to after the bars close or to cure hangovers. But there’s hardly a soul at one o’clock Sunday-night-slash-Monday-morning. 

Jensen’s pulling an all-nighter and needs coffee; Jared jumps at any chance to see him. 

It’s quiet and easy at the square table. They’re sitting across from the other, feet tangled underneath, and soft, sleepy smiles up top. Jensen’s eyes are shot as he looks over the rim of his mug, but Jared still grins right back while stirring creamer into his own drink. It’s quiet right there, even with some noise across the restaurant, or the waitress stopping by to ask if they want anything else. 

Jensen’s amazed that Jared is this silent. That he’s not running off, mouth flapping, and going insane with so much to say. But he’s even more amazed that he’d pulled himself from a night of sleep to be here. It’s been a few months now, and there’s been a lot between them – even with the last few weeks of freezing one another out, both on purpose and not – and Jensen feels it swell in his chest. He wants to say something. He wants to let it out. And his lips part and he licks his mouth just thinking about it.

Jared’s smiling gently and just watching right back. And Jensen knows it’s the perfect time to say it, but Jared’s looking up and shaking his head and chuckling before Jensen can even realize that Tom and Mike and Chad and Misha are pulling tables and chairs over and settling all around them.

Jensen watches it all go down. They’re drunk and happy and laughing over everything. Jared’s not so much joining the conversation, but he’s following and chuckling right along with them over the stories of girls and rejections and crazy antics in the parking lot of the bar a block or so away.

He leaves the table for the bathroom, and there he’s reminded of how quiet and easy it’d been for the last twenty minutes. With Jared his only tablemate and how he was so ready to say what’s been on his mind for the last few weeks, but he hasn’t had a chance to let free.

After washing his hands, he turns to the door and is surprised at Jared pushing his way into the room and locking the door behind him. 

“Can we just have a minute? Jesus,” Jared complains, but Jensen knows it’s not at him. It’s just the whole thing, these last few weeks.

Before he can properly answer, Jared engulfs him in a full body hug and presses his face into Jensen’s neck. There’s heavy breathing as Jared obviously smells Jensen’s skin and the edge of his hooded sweatshirt. Jensen takes the moment and his eyes are closed for a fair amount of time until Jared sighs and shifts back against the door without letting go. “You better now?” Jensen asks, amused.

“Ten times better.” Jared pushes his face back into the neck to kiss, and then says, “Damnit, I’ve missed you.”

Jensen opens his eyes and is staring at the graffitied door: _Don’t hate me because I banged your mom_ followed by a different tag of _No problem, now we’re even._ He takes a quick breath and then mumbles, “Well, this is romantic.”

They break apart and Jared looks over his shoulder with a laugh. “That’s so Chad.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised.”

“No, I mean,” and Jared points at the second line of text. “That’s _Chad_.”

Jensen leans against Jared, chuckling and resting his forehead at Jared’s shoulder. They fall back into a hug even while laughing at the matter. He feels good to just be there with Jared and not thinking about anything important.

“We stay here any longer, they’re gonna think this was more than just a private break.”

“I’m not blowing you in here,” Jensen insists. 

Jared chuckles, “I don’t think I want you to. It’s nasty in here.”

Jensen looks around and takes in the grime and littered toilet paper, not to mention the small puddles of water that suggest the toilet might’ve overflowed recently. He turns back to Jared, presses one quick kiss, and nods. “Let’s get outta here.” 

They go through the rest of the coffee break with their friends – Chris and Steve and few others join them soon enough. They’re all laughing and downing coffee and eggs and pancakes and it’s actually a really great moment.

Jensen keeps eyeing Jared, taking in how his eyes are suddenly brighter and the smile is broader. That his laugh is bordering on giggles, signaling that he probably needs to go back to bed soon, but it’s obvious he’s not leaving, even when Chad and Tom head out. 

Jared shoots him tiny glances with the barest of sweet smiles, and it makes Jensen warm in so many ways. He loves Jared. Right here, like this. But he can’t yell it across the table.

And he can’t say it in the parking lot with everyone around, or on the walk back through campus because they split up so Jensen can get back to studying alone. 

When he’s in bed with the sun coming up and knowing that Jared’s already wound himself down, he calls Jared’s cell, sure he won’t pick up, and starts rambling on his message.

“I’ve barely seen you lately, and when I do someone’s always around. And I can’t tell you anything that I want to say …” He doesn’t get to the word, can’t, he just keeps spinning around, and then he’s interrupted even _here_. When he’s going to let it all out the doorbell sounds and he throws the phone to the bed without a thought of it bouncing to the floor with the battery shooting out and away from the rest of the cell. 

As he opens the door, it’s pushed back, and then he’s got Jared all around him. 

Jared’s palm is warm and wide at the back of his head as they kiss. It’s not rough, but it’s not tender. There’s something in it and then Jared’s basically just breathing into Jensen’s mouth as theirs chests heave against one another. Finally, there’s a quiet mumble as Jared tries to speak.

“What?” Jensen asks.

Jared pulls back, closes his eyes, and rests his forehead to Jensen’s. “I love you.”

His breath catches and he’s thinking of saying it right back but instead, “You could look at me when you say that,” falls out of his mouth.

Jared laughs. He smiles and kisses him again. “I’ve loved you for a while …”

“Yeah, you’re kinda obvious.”

“But I waited to say it.”

Jensen smiles easily and nods. “Yeah, me, too.”

“How long?”

“Since the bathroom.”

Jared pushes him, but not too far away. “You’re such a jerk.”

He laughs at Jared and tugs him into the house. “Stay?” Without answer, Jared follows and falls into bed. Wound around each other and seconds from sleeping, Jensen whispers against his cheek, “Love you.”

Jared slips closer and hums right back.


	7. Timestamp: Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timestamp: Reunion over Christmas Break

They’d thought it would be easy, considering how much they promised to follow through. It was four hours one way, but they were sure they could manage a two-hour ride to meet anywhere in the middle. Except Murphy’s Law attacked Christmas Break and they encountered not only long family holidays but broken down cars and seasonal jobs. It made Jensen surly and Jared downright boorish.

When it’s finally time, or at least the day, Jared is running through the house, footsteps heavy and bothersome. So much so that his mother keeps yelling at him from the kitchen. “JT! Think you could stop with the racket?! And take out the garbage!”

His voice travels from the upstairs bathroom through the hallway and into his room as he shouts back, “I ain’t takin’ the garbage out! I’m leaving!”

“For good? Dear Lord, be so kind.”

“I heard that!” he yells on his way down the stairs and through the kitchen.

She shuffles behind him as he ravages through the fridge, swatting him in the ass with a spatula. “Your ears ain’t broke? Wonderful! Now you can finish drying the dishes _and_ take out the garbage like you promised.”

Jared looks up with crazy eyes and even crazier eyebrows that are pushed right down to his eyelashes. “I never promised nothin’!”

As Sherry starts fussing at him, he’s piling a couple bottles of water and cans of soda into his shirt, pulling the hem out for more carrying room. He even tucks a few cheese string packages into his mouth. “You are not goin’ anywhere until you finish up your chores. I hardly ask much of you,” and she pauses to yank the cheeses out of his mouth then smack him upside the head with them. “And you still fight me on it.”

“Mama, c’mon,” he whines, complete with sad eyes and a deep frown. “I’m gonna be late if I don’t leave soon.” He pauses then huffs. “I’m already late, really.”

With a hand on her hip, she regards him a few moments. “Now, I don’t see why you couldn’t just have him come on up here.”

Jared leans in and gives her a tight smile. “Because then he’d listen to you ride my ass all day.”

Sherry smacks him again. “Don’t say ass. Ya ass,” she adds with a smirk as she moves back to the sink. When he grabs more snacks from the cupboard – ranging from bagged chips to granola bars to applesauce – she sighs. “Hope you don’t plan on eatin’ all that on the way up.”

He replies without even looking at her, still scavenging for snacks. “I’m a growin’ boy, Mama. Gotta keep my energy up and my muscles big. Keep my boyfriend happy.”

She gives him a raised eyebrow and then he chuckles, and it turns into cackling and she swats him again. “Get outta my face, Jared.”

He can’t leave fast enough.

And he can’t drive any faster.

Can’t keep his mind wrapped around the fact that after three hellishly long weeks, unfulfilled with texts and lengthy calls and only a handful with phone sex, he can finally see and touch and smell his boyfriend. 

And apparently Jensen is also antsy for the rendezvous because he texts Jared for the whole last half hour of the ride, having already arrived at the hotel. It ranges from mocking Jared for not being able to tell time to ragging on him for not being able to tell time. And finally to teasing him.

_gonna watch porn. take care of myself_

Jared groans at his phone then yelps when his car swings into the right lane, narrowly avoiding another car. _Don’t you dare touch! 20mins!_ he sends back.

_can go 2 rounds in 20_

_HATE U SFM_

_goddam. am so hard._

Jared throws his cell to the footwell and tosses a hand through his hair. He can’t do this, can’t read Jensen’s texts even if they’re not even that bad yet. Because he’s already feeling it and his hand goes down to his jeans, pushing himself down and trying to think of other things, like his sweet little grandma’s smile, puppies, and baseball. But then he thinks of all sports, especially basketball, and rubbing up against Jensen while playing defense and his phone beeps with a new text. He ignores it, has to, and starts a new train of thought. His mother, Amy Winehouse, a particularly difficult Calculus problem from his final … but then he thinks of class and sitting next to Mike and then Jensen and how he’d love to shove him against the wipeboard and the phone beeps _again_.

“AHHHHH!” he shouts, long and loud, yanking on the wheel and fiercely shaking his head. After he calms, he reaches for the phone, doing his best to stay within his lane, and then checks the texts. 

_wish you were here. could watch me fuck myself wide open_

He whimpers.

_imagining your dick up there. pounding me into the bed_

Jared shoves the gas pedal into the floor and races his way there. He’s unaware of the last fifteen minutes of the ride, just that he comes to a screeching halt in the parking lot, that he jogs through the parking lot and inside, and that he sprints his way through the hallways until he can reach the room. He’s knocking frantically, ignoring the looks of patrons passing him. He doesn’t care, he has to be in that room, with Jensen, _now_.

The door swings open and Jared stares, unsure if he’s happy that Jensen is fully clothed and not moving on without him or fucking disappointed in the fact that Jensen is fully clothed and not fingering himself like he’d said he was.

“In a hurry or something?” Jensen asks with a smirk.

Jared breathes deep and just takes it all in. Three weeks is a really damned long time for them, and he needs a moment to just look. The typically disheveled hair and the warm, green eyes, perfect skin accented by even more perfect freckles, and then he stalls on the plump lips and he has to be there. Right _there_ on that mouth. 

He dumps his bag and surges forward, pushing Jensen back without even meaning to, but he’s right in the guy’s space with his mouth wrapped around Jensen’s and they’re moving into the room, door closing behind him. 

“God, I missed you,” Jared pants into Jensen’s mouth while tugging his tee up. His hands stop their efforts in the name of touching warm skin.

Jensen chuckles and tugs on Jared’s jeans, smiling at the missing belt, dipping his fingers in enough to tease.

“Took the thing off in the car. You’re a dirty tease. It was fucking torture.”

He chuckles again and starts unbuttoning the pants, pushing them down before even touching Jared’s shirts. “Knew you’d like it.”

“I’d rather you let me actually do those things you said. You’re gonna right?”

Jensen smirks into Jared’s mouth as he nudges him even further into the room. “Got all day and night.”

“God, you,” Jared marvels as his fingers roam and squeeze at Jensen’s back and chest, feeling all his muscles bunch with every move. “I can’t wait. The things I wanna do to you.”

Jensen pushes Jared into the big armchair in the corner and flashes a sly smile as he kneels between Jared’s legs. “The things _I_ thought about while waitin’ on you.”

He nearly whines, ready to blame it all on his mama, but then he tosses that thought out of his brain because there’s no way he can look at Jensen yanking his shirt off, settling between Jared’s naked legs, and licking his lips while thinking of her. 

In one quick drop, Jensen takes Jared. It’s not pretty, except that Jared loves seeing Jensen’s mouth forced wide around his dick and how obscenely he moves up and down, saliva slicking up lips and his own cock, and Jensen runs up the length then back down. 

Jared slides down in the chair so he can grab Jensen’s head, yank at whatever hair is long enough, and get a better view of Jensen sucking him off. He’s murmuring all the good notions in his brain, reciting the thrum of heat filling his body to encourage Jensen to keep going, to take him even deeper. It’s louder as it gets wetter and soon enough Jared is kicking his hips up while tugging Jensen’s hair, forcing him up and down, unable to control himself because it’s just too God damned good to not do this.

But then Jensen pops off, pushes himself out of Jared’s hands and moves forward, plunging his tongue into Jared’s mouth so they can share the taste and heat of Jared’s dick. Which twitches as Jensen straddles him, as he reaches between the frame and the cushion and works with the lube he’d stashed there long before Jared even stepped foot in the door. Jared smiles into the kiss, grabs Jensen’s hips to move him over his dick, making it slide through the curve of Jensen’s ass. Even while Jensen slicks up his own fingers and reaches back to slide them right in.

“Really wanted to do this before you came,” Jensen says with a grin. “So close to doing it, too.”

Jared surges closer to nip at Jensen’s mouth. “Why didn’t ya?”

He breathes heavy as he works himself open and stalls his answer. But he finally says, “Was waiting for you.”

Foreheads smash together as Jared focuses on the press of Jensen’s ass along his dick, how Jensen’s fingers fumble and are slick and loud. “Fuck, I was dyin’ to get here. You have no idea.”

Jensen slows as he gets nearer to ready, as he worries about being too close. “No, I know,” he reasons easily with a quirk of his mouth. Then he admits, “I wanted you to be here for it. Want you to watch. But can’t wait now.”

Jared reaches back and pushes on the back of Jensen’s hand to force his hand faster and deeper. “Please tell me you’re ready. Please, do.”

He chuckles against Jared’s temple and removes his hand, which prompts Jared to run a finger around the rim, feeling the tender hole twitching and ready. He leans back enough get a hand between them and lubes himself up and Jensen moves closer, lowering himself as Jared guides himself up. Jared’s wide palms and long fingers span Jensen’s ass as he enters. It’s a long, torturous slide, and they’re motionless for even longer moments as Jared fills him, wholly fills him with his hard, beating cock, blood pumping wildly, and Jared thinks he’ll burst right there. He can’t, he has to last, make this last.

It only gets worse when Jensen starts moving, rising up then sliding back down. Jared’s hands clench along with Jensen’s ass, squeezing tight to the muscles working as Jensen starts rocking and rolling his hips while reaching for Jared’s face. Fingers graze his cheeks and his brows, push sweaty hair off his forehead, and then grip tight to the tendrils curling at his neck. The pull on his hair, the force of his head back, opens his neck up for Jensen’s mouth to suck and bite and lick. And he does it while forcing his body over Jared’s.

But he won’t complain, can’t, is actually rendered speechless with the feel of Jensen’s smooth body enveloping his dick, slipping and sliding, dirty and fast. Jensen’s fingers continue wrenching through Jared’s hair, forcing him in all directions as he rises up, the head of Jared’s cock almost dropping out, but not quite. Jensen moves quick and fast, up and down over just the head, letting it pierce his hole over and over while his tongue fucks its way into Jared’s mouth. Just the same as Jared is fucking into him. 

They’re moaning, loud and nonsensically, the noises vibrating through their mouths and then Jared’s broad hands clamp down on Jensen’s ass, kneading and pinching because he can’t do this anymore, can’t hold out, and he leads Jensen, forcing his dick deep. Repeatedly, shoving himself up and Jensen down. 

Jensen’s mouth spouts obscenity after obscenity, moaning in between, and still jerking his hands through Jared’s hair. They let up when Jared’s hand curls around Jensen’s thick, throbbing dick. When it starts to squeeze and tug and work Jensen even closer, Jensen’s hands release and instead palm Jared’s head, hair sliding between his fingers. He presses himself against Jared, chest to chest, his cheekbone pressing hard into Jared’s temple as he coaxes him to _keep it up, keep going, don’t stop, don’t you dare fucking stop_.

Jared doesn’t, and then Jensen is clamping his lips down in a muffled cry as he shakes and comes. Jared nudges his head and finds Jensen’s mouth, rams his tongue in a sloppy, lopsided kiss as he keeps pushing up. But he doesn’t last long because even when Jensen is coming down, all limp muscles and lazy kisses, Jared can’t ignore that he brought Jensen to this, and he groans into Jensen’s mouth, spilling inside.

Jensen collapses fully into Jared, slack jawed, warm and lazy and heavy. Jared holds him close, relishes this feeling because Jensen is with him, in his arms, unguarded and pliable. He loves the press of Jensen’s chest to his as they both steady their breathing and sweat mixes to be _theirs_, a result of _their_ sex.

He holds tight around Jensen’s hips and manages to heave them up and over to the bed, and they separate only long enough for Jared to slide out before he rolls right into Jensen. He latches back on, this time settling atop most of Jensen, head tucked beneath Jensen’s and arms winding. 

“Damn,” Jensen mumbles.

“I know,” Jared says with a tiny chuckle, right against Jensen’s throat.

“Not like I wanted to be apart that long, but kinda worth it.”

He chuckles again and moves impossibly closer. “Not sure I want another three weeks.”

Jensen’s hand skates up Jared’s back and settles at his neck, fingers playing in the ends of his hair. “Nah, never that long.”

Jared smiles, feeling more than sated with Jensen _right there_.


	8. Timestamp: Studying

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timestamp: Studying together

The best thing, in Jared’s opinion, is for Jensen to sleep. They’ve both been logging long hours studying for finals, rushing from classes to the library, to study groups, and back to the dorms for even more reading, note-taking, and practice tests. 

So when they’re studying in Jared’s room, alone for the first time in a long while with Chad at his new girl’s place, and Jensen leans back on his bed, book propped up from his chest, and closes his eyes, Jared lets him sleep. 

Jared keeps flipping through his textbook, back and ass aching from the hard chair at his desk, but he’s not about to interrupt Jensen’s chance to get some shut eye, especially given how cranky, anxious, and temperamental he’s been all week with so little sleep. 

A good two hours later, Jared yawns, louder than he’d meant to, and Jensen stirs on the mattress. Jensen shifts to his side, grumbling incoherently, then shoots up to stare at the clock at the desk. “What the fuck?!”

Jared flinches in his seat and stares at Jensen. “What?”

Jensen doesn’t look over, only bitches, “What the fuck, Jared,” while rubbing the heel of his hand at one of his eyes. 

“What?” Jared harps right back.

“How could you let me sleep? Fuck. Two hours, Jared. That’s study time. God.”

Jared narrows his eyes and glares as Jensen snaps his book shut and grabs another notebook to flip through. “Okay. Sorry I thought you could use the rest.”

Jensen’s voice gets quiet, but he’s still tense. “Yeah, well, I need to study.”

“Alright, then study,” Jared mumbles back.

“I will,” he replies indignantly.

“Okay, good.”

“Yeah. Good,” Jensen says with a small sigh. After fifteen minutes, he snaps his notebook closed and tosses it on the ground.

Jared’s shocked by the sudden noises and looks over with as straight a face as possible. “You done studying?”

Jensen fights to hide a laugh, and pushes himself further down in the bed. “I don’t think I’ll ever be done.”

“Yeah, well,” Jared mumbles as he turns back to his book. “That’s school.”

“I’m tired of Linear Algebra.”

“Says the math major.”

“What’re you doing?”

Jared points at his book with a flat face. “Studying.” Jensen doesn’t say more but when Jared looks over, Jensen’s staring at him. “What?”

“I’m bored.”

“So study.” Jensen gives him a tired look and Jared laughs at him. “Just five minutes ago you were yelling at me for letting you sleep through studying.”

“Well, yeah, because I didn’t get to choose to sleep. I’m choosing to ignore the book right now.” Jared simply raises an eyebrow and Jensen smirks at him. “Come here.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m bored and you always entertain me.”

Jared laughs. “Like I’m your toy?”

“Maybe?”

Going back to his book, Jared does his best to ignore Jensen. But it doesn’t work well and within two minutes, Jared closes his book then crawls up the bed and settles in next to Jensen, head on Jensen’s chest and arms slung tight around his waist. “I need to nap. Just half an hour.”

“I already slept,” Jensen points out with a smile in his words.

“Yeah, I let you sleep. Now let me,” Jared returns as he burrows in closer to Jensen. 

Jensen pulls Jared in tight. “Okay, thirty minutes.”


	9. Timestamp: Come Hungry, Leave Happy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timestamp: Jensen's Birthday

Jensen pulls the door open and winces against the brightness of morning. He’s well aware it’s before seven because his alarm has yet to go off. And judging by how freaking exhausted he still is, it’s been only a few hours since he fell asleep.

Worse yet, he’s quite positive that it’s Jared. Because no one else bothers stopping by at this hour on a school day. And Jared lives to make him miserably tired by always showing up when he wants to sleep.

“_What?_” Jensen croaks with sleep dragging down his voice and his attitude.

Jared grins and tugs on the screen door but he frowns as it rattles in the frame, locked and kept in place. When he looks up to Jensen, he twists his mouth. “Jensen. C’mon. Let me in.”

“It’s too fucking early,” Jensen replies simply. 

Another frown and Jared jiggles the handle on the screen door. “I’ve got a surprise for you and you’re not getting it if you don’t let me in.”

Jensen yawns in reply, otherwise unmoving.

“Hey, come on,” Jared whines.

“I have class in four hours,” Jensen whines in return. “And a stats lab to finish.”

Jared presses his face to the screen, pushing his nose and mouth to it. “I … have … a … surprise,” he says slowly. 

“For what?”

Jared’s lips turn into a disturbing image as they’re smashed against the screen. “Your birthday.”

Jensen blinks away some of the fatigue wracking his brain. “Okay. Keep talking.”

Leaning back from the screen, Jared shrugs. “I was gonna take you out for breakfast, but you’re being a grouch.”

He takes a few long moments to assess Jared and think it over. Free breakfast out, not just a bowl of cereal gone soggy while he crams in the last few tasks of his Stats work. “Where to?”

“Some place special,” Jared replies with a high eyebrow, lips curled into a smirk.

He debates trying to drag their destination out of Jared versus being surprised. But Jared looks mighty proud at the moment. “Do I need a shower?” he asks with interest.

Jared laughs at him, shaking his head. “I’m on a budget, man. It’s nowhere fancy.”

Jensen frowns and finally unlocks the screen door to step outside, but Jared stops him.

“Dude, you gotta at least change,” Jared complains as he eyes Jensen’s worn sleep pants, holes littering the left thigh and right knee. “Your junk ain’t for everyone. Just me,” he ends with a quick leer. 

“You’re awfully picky for seven in the morning,” Jensen grumbles as he steps back inside.

“I’ve got standards. And you’re not meeting them right now,” Jared calls through the screen door as Jensen disappears to change.

*

When Jensen realizes the restaurant that Jared is heading towards, he snorts and shakes his head. Then he tries to consider the upsides to the International House of Pancakes.

It isn’t the dining hall. The food’ll be fresh and made to order. And it isn’t Denny’s. Those trips never go well for them no matter how drunk they are. Or sober, even.

So, truth be told, he and Jared don’t get out much for decent food considering their budgets. Jensen tells himself he can’t judge right now. At least Jared is doing his best for Jensen’s birthday, an event they hadn’t even discussed. 

Their surprisingly (and quite terrifyingly) perky waitress pours coffee into their overturned mugs with a grin brighter than even Jared can manage. “Good morning, boys!”

“Morning,” Jared smiles back as he wiggles in his seat with sudden energy. 

Jensen sips his coffee with his eyes on Jared, amused as usual by Jared’s simple happiness.

“Welcome to IHOP,” she nods at Jared with a knowing smile then turns it on Jensen. “And _haaaaaaaaapy_,” she draws out, causing Jensen to smirk at Jared with delight that Jared has actually planned and followed through on a surprise. “National Pancake Day!”

His mouth immediately drops as he now just stares at Jared. 

She pulls her order pad from a pocket on her apron and taps her pen to it. “I’m assuming you two want the free celebratory short stacks? Would you like to add on some eggs, sausage, or bacon? Maybe some home fries?”

“I’ll take the Quick Two-Egg Breakfast, fried, with sausage,” Jared answers quickly, handing her his untouched menu.

Jensen bites into his bottom lip to keep from huffing at the waitress. It’s not her fault his boyfriend’s a bottomless pit and thinks with his appetite. “The same,” he replies, rather level. “Scrambled instead of fried.”

“You got it!” she nearly squeaks and runs off to another table.

Flipping his lips out with a noise, Jensen nods at Jared with surprising restraint. “So. National Pancake Day.”

“And my gorgeous boyfriend’s birthday,” Jared returns quickly, wrapping his feet around Jensen’s. “Two birds. One stone.”

“I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“Am I buying you breakfast?” Jared asks with a quirky smile.

“It’s already free.”

Jared tsks. “Not the Quick Two,” he points out, grabbing onto Jensen’s hands across the table. 

Jensen flicks an eyebrow as he looks across the restaurant, mentally counting the number of college kids across the room who are obviously taking advantage of the free breakfast. 

“And you’re hungry, right?” Jared asks with a leading tone.

“A little,” he admits.

Jared nods with a knowing smile. “So, not such a bad idea, huh?”

Even while he isn’t all too offended by the circumstances, he still puts on a sourpuss face and looks away. “I’m pretty sure you’re getting the better end of the deal here.”

“Yeah, but, later,” he starts with a playful flutter of his eyebrows. “I got Chris and Steve to leave and we can do whatever you want back at your house.”

It interests him, but he keeps giving Jared a long look. “Still pretty sure you win in this situation.”

Jared pulls on Jensen’s hands to drag him across the table as he rises to smack a kiss to the corner of Jensen’s mouth. “Pretty sure I always win with you.”

Despite the warm smile working its way across his face, Jensen rolls his eyes and glances away. “You’re such a kiss ass.”

“I can do that later, too.”

Jensen immediately turns back to Jared. “Maybe you’re not all bad,” he murmurs, running his finger across the bumps of Jared’s knuckles. 

“Keep trying to tell you that,” Jared replies, followed by a wink.

“I’m catching on,” Jensen smirks back.


	10. Timestamp: Road Trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timestamp: Road tripping for Christmas Break

It’s too damn early and Jensen is too damn tired. But Jared had insisted if it was going to work, it had to be now, like this, so Jensen silently drops his bag next to Jared’s car and sighs. He leans against the side of the trunk and glances at Jared leaning into the back seat. “Please tell me you actually have a plan?”

“I do!” Jared calls from inside.

“Provisions?”

“Flamin’ Hot Fritos, Chee-tohs, Pringles.”

“Music?”

Jared’s still half hanging out of the car but Jensen can see him rummaging through bags. “Three mix CDs and Chad’s XM receiver.”

“You made mix CDs?” he asks slowly.

Glancing over his shoulder, Jared is barely smiling while his cheeks are going pink. “Yeah. Some road tunes, and you know, some of your stuff and …”

“You made us mix CDs?” This time Jensen is more amused and he slaps the side of Jared’s leg. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Whatever,” Jared mumbles.

“Drinks?”

“Water, Dr. Pepper, and Red Bull.”

Jensen remains silent as he watches Jared come out from the backseat and move around to the open front door.

Jared leans in and comes back with a white cup and a smile. “And coffee.”

“I love you,” Jensen says softly. He smiles and moves in to grab the drink as he kisses Jared soundly on the lips.

Jared’s smiling as Jensen slips back to rest against the car again. “Me or the coffee?”

“Give me five and I’ll let you know.” With just a few sips, he feels his body go warm, but it could also be how Jared is now right on front of him with those lovely, huge hands wrapping around Jensen’s hips and squeezing. And maybe also Jared’s sweet smile as he looks right into Jensen’s eyes.

“Whenever you’re ready, sweet cheeks,” Jared says with a smirk.

Jensen takes a long gulp and holds the cup closely to his shoulder, allowing Jared to move in closer. He hums and accepts Jared’s quick kiss. “You’re a lot more excited about this now than you were when we first talked about this.”

“Well, yeah, I’m nervous as hell about your parents,” Jared murmurs.

Jensen knows how nervous, after all the awkward disagreements over what to do for Christmas. On most breaks - last winter, spring, summer, Thanksgiving - Jensen had driven all the way down to Jared’s parents’ to visit, or they’d met halfway. Sure, Jensen’s parents have come to visit on weekends and the four of them have had dinner or lunch here and there, but Jared had expressed his concerns about spending an entire week in someone else’s house, not to mention abandoning his own parents for Christmas.

Just as Jensen had insisted, Jared’s mom had been slightly disappointed yet ecstatic that a year after Jensen and Jared had gotten together, they were still going strong and Jensen had wanted Jared _with him_ for the holidays.

“But?” Jensen prods.

“But, I get a week with you and no school-”

“And all the food your giant stomach can handle.”

Jared grins for a second then shakes his head. “And I shouldn’t really complain.”

“No, you shouldn’t,” Jensen teases, pinching Jared’s side.

“No more complaining,” he insists with a firm nod. “I promise. Just you, me, food, and love.”

“And sex,” Jensen replies with a nod of his own.

“Of course! All those things. You, me, food, love, and sex. All week long.”

Jensen eyes him for a second and twists his mouth. “But not, like, all at the same time.”

Jared seems to think on it then lifts an eyebrow. “It could be fun.”

“Maybe all but the food,” Jensen laughs.

With a sigh, Jared rolls his eyes. “If you insist.”

He laughs again and tugs Jared close with his fingers slipping into Jared’s belt loops. “We’ll play it by ear, alright, hot shot?”

“Alright,” Jared murmurs just before kissing Jensen softly.


	11. Timestamp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timestamp: Set later in college, Chad & Jared now share an apartment.

Jensen crosses his arms and glares at Chad, who only shrugs as he tries to again heft the mattress up away from the box spring.

"You could help, you know," Chad complains before the mattress slides against the wall and makes him stumble under the weight of it.

"And why would I do that?"

"Because you're the only other one here."

Jensen rolls his eyes and shakes his head before going back to the living room. Moments later, Tom and Mike come through the front door without knocking and pause when they see Jensen. 

"We're not interrupting are we?" Mike asks immediately.

"Because the last time you were here in the middle of the day," Tom adds, "I saw parts of your undercarriage that I'd rather not."

Jensen glances at each of them for the crazy morons that they are. Yeah, sure, even as they're all old enough for apartment living in college Jensen still stays on his own for a little piece and quiet and they tend to use Jared's place for extracurricular activities ... but at the moment, Jensen points out, "I'm fully clothed."

"Jay could be fully not," Tom points out.

"Jay is fully not even here."

"Oh, good," Mike sighs.

Jensen drops onto the couch and flips through a few different channels, only partly caring when Mike and Tom smoosh into the couch on either side, causing them all to lean into the center of the old hand-me-down. 

"So what're you doing here?" Mike asks. "Aside from poaching their cable."

"He's not helping me, is what that assfucker is doing," Chad yells from Jared's bedroom. 

"Why aren't you helping him ... with whatever he's doing?"

"Because he's an uptight shit who doesn't approve," Chad complains as he joins them in the living room, apparently still unable to move the mattress on his own. He flops down on the rug and spreads out, chest heaving with exaggerated efforts. 

"Of course I don't approve!" Jensen bitches. "I sleep on that mattress, too."

"Which I don't approve of."

"Oh, here we go," Jensen mumbles.

"You two lock yourselves up in there for this loud, hyena like monkey sex for hours and I sit on the other side of the wall, forced to listen to it."

No one says anything for a moment until Jensen dares to ask, "How is it both like a hyena and a monkey?"

"You obviously don't know what you two sound like."

Before Jensen can fully roll his eyes, Jared enters the apartment, slams the door, then takes in the room. "Hey, the gang's all here. What're you guys doing?"

"We're watching TV," Jensen says before pointing at Chad, "While this douchenugget tries to move your mattress onto the balcony."

"Dude!" Chad yells. "Why did you tell him?"

Jared kicks Chad's side as he passes to the kitchen. "Like I wouldn't notice it when I came home."

"And it's not like you actually succeeded," Jensen points out.

Shaking his head, Chad grumbles, "No thanks to you."

"So the mattress is still in there?" Jared asks.

"Safe and sound," Jensen assures him, keeping eye contact even as their friends are busy watching TV.

"You wanna?" Jared suggests with a quick flick of his eyebrows and head tilt towards the hallway.

"Of course." Jensen grins and jumps out of the couch, laughing as Mike and Tom tumble into one another. 

He laughs harder when Chad yells, "Seriously! Like a hyena and monkey in the wild!"


End file.
